Miss Brenda!

Wiki-Research Report

2012-01-28T18:23:00.000-05:00

AA recurring piece of public statuary stands in twelve locations from Maryland to California, tracing a historic travel route from "covered wagon days." The statue is the Madonna of the Trail, an 18-ft. tall tribute to the pioneer mothers who traveled west with their crazy husbands (emphasis mine).

If this doesn't have Ms Brenda written all over it I don't know what does. A tribute to the faith and love of strong brave women. Plus they weigh 5 tons each. Oh I am going to see all twelve of these identical women with rattlesnakes at their feet, a rifle in one hand, and a baby in the other. (Funded and dedicated by my new friend Harry Truman.)
Roadside America suggests:
To properly honor the pioneer spirit, one should retrace the entire trail, and photograph all twelve cookie cutter statues. Or, with less honor, take twelve photos of one and say you saw 'em all...

1.Bethesda, Maryland
2.Beallsville, Pennsylvania
3.Wheeling, West Virginia
4.Springfield, Ohio
5.Richmond, Indiana
6.Vandalia, Illinois
7.Lexington, Missouri
8.Council Grove, Kansas
9.Lamar, Colorado
10.Albuquerque, New Mexico
11.Springerville, Arizona
12.Upland, California

Oddly enough, my vacation is already scheduled in the Beallsville vicinity. I love it when a plan comes together.

Ms Brenda's Excellent Adventure

2012-01-28T17:18:00.002-05:00

And Reasonable Resolution #3

One of last year's reasonable resolutions was to read one book a month. Which quickly became two books a month. Because reasonable resolutions are just that easy to keep.
For Christmas this year the STP got me a Kindle. With a great green case. And before I left for my trip I downloaded Harry Truman's Excellent Adventure (based on Amazon's recommendation, the fact that my favorite brother is currently reading his way through presidential biographies, and the fact that it was less than three dollars.) While I traveled East I read the first part of the book in which Harry and Bess also travel East. And on the way home I finished the book--dropping Harry and Bess off as close to Independence, Missouri as I could from my Boeing.
A quote for you:

Truman didn't think much of memorials to the living. "You can never tell what foolishness they may get into before the get into a pine box and then the memorial sometimes has to be torn down."

Also, I would like to take a road trip with the STP and stop at bizarre little diners. And write down everything we eat, and save all the gas receipts in the glove compartment. I am adding this to my bucket list right after 'Visit Paris'.

And I am going to do some research on Madonnas of the Trail statues. Because I think these must be a cross between Muffler Men and the Mother of All Mother statues.

For the record, I also finished Henry Blackaby's book on Leadership this month. It is called:

Spiritual Leadership: Movin... Henry T. Black...

I am pretty sure there is more to the title than that, but that is all that fits on my Kindle screen. I like my Kindle but I have not mastered it. I can highlight and take notes, but I'm not sure how to access them. And I have no idea how 'big' the book is. I know how far along I am. 37%...52%...86% Which is one step better than holding your book closed with your finger marking your place and guessing how far along you are. But there is no sense of how thick the book is. Like is it a little paperback, or a big honking thick book? For some reason this is important information for me. I will have to judge my kindle books by how long they take to read. A bubble bath book. A two day I am not getting off the couch book. A month long book. An I'll never finish this I need the space on my Kindle I might as well delete this book.

Reasonable Resolution #3--Read two books a month in 2012.

Special Ladies

2012-01-26T11:20:00.004-05:00

Me with the sisters I grew up with.

Me with the sisters I gave birth to.

Four generations. Three moms. Three daughters. Two grandmas. Two granddaughters. One great grandma. One great granddaughter.

You can probably see some family resemblances. Genetics is a scary thing. (Remember there are no lifeguards in the gene pool.) Only one lady pictured here can not hot dog roll her tongue. She better hope that the dementia gene isn't on the same chromosome, or she will be the only one to remind us when to take our pills.

For Crying Out Loud

2012-01-25T23:51:00.001-05:00

I don't think I cried when my parents dropped me off at college and drove away. But I think I've cried everytime I've left home since. By the time I was a Junior in college my Mom would take me to the bus stop and put me on the bus because she couldn't stand me crying for the two hour trip back to school. After I was married, the STP hated the drive away from my parents house whenever we visited because I cried for the first part of the trip. I don't have a particulary hard time being away from home. But I have a really hard time leaving home.
My Mom and Dad took me to the airport yesterday and I teared up as I hugged them goodbye. "How old are you?" they asked. Not too old to cry, obviously.

30,000 Pageviews

2012-01-19T23:05:00.000-05:00

Today I will reach 30,000 pageviews on my blog. You could be the thirty thousandth pageviewer. Lucky you. Did your day just get better, or what?

While I Am Gone

2012-01-19T23:01:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow am I am leaving on a jet plane. Well, a regional jet plane. And I will be arriving on a less than a jet plane. Like a propeller plane. Where every seat is a window seat. And an aisle seat. (Rose Tenenhier will have to sit somewhere behind me.) I am traveling light. Like amazingly light. Clean underwear and my Kindle light. I downloaded three books. (I don't mean to brag, but I did that all by myself.)
I am going to have lunch on Saturday with my girls and their husbands. And the BGsITW. And my Mom and Dad. And all of my favorite brothers and sisters and most of their spouses and all their kids who can make it. Since I am traveling light, I have made arrangements to bring the rolls. I am giggling already just thinking about it.
I. Can't. Wait.
When I get back I will be older than I am now. Five days older. One year older.
I was going to tell you how I am not having a problem getting older. How a birthday is a cause to celebrate. How I am embracing my age. But I still need to color my hair before I go to bed.
See you when I get back.

Creative Time Wasting

2012-01-18T09:03:00.001-05:00

Pinterest. Where I spend each evening finding new ideas, recipes, projects, colors, etc. that I don't have time to try. Was just wondering why I have no new projects or things I have done to tell you about and realized that I have done nothing. So in the interest of more interesting blog entries (as well as a more interesting life) I am swearing off Pinterest ~~for the rest of my life~~ ~~for the rest of the month~~ ~~week~~ ~~day~~ till after I shower.
Did you know you can make ice orbs for your winter garden with balloons and food coloring?

3:17

2012-01-15T20:15:00.001-05:00

Not in John but in Daniel. If I ever get around to setting real goals for 2012 this will be my verse for the year. Daniel 3:17 ...the God we serve is able..., and He will... The fact that it is about being thrown into a fiery furnace concerns me just a little.

Reasonable Resolutions

2012-01-12T13:11:00.002-05:00

2. Delete all of 2011 pictures from camera.

Ms Brenda Gets Her Mojo Back

2012-01-11T23:49:00.000-05:00

Like Amidala, I have been in somewhat of a funk since Christmas. And then one day this week I got up and made the Goob chocolate pancakes.

And the same day I took down the Christmas decorations (with a little help from the ever-getting-taller Goob.)

And I actually put an exercise DVD in the DVD player.

And I logged 10000 steps on my pedometer.

Not to mention 5 loads of laundry.

And I think 2012 may be the year that I lose that extra weight and organize my photos.

One Wednesday in January

2012-01-11T23:30:00.002-05:00

On Wednesdays I go back to work after three days off. (I don't really like going back to work on Wednesdays.) But the good part of my Wednesday schedule is the time. I don't have to go early. And I don't have to stay late. So I don't have to drive in the dark. And on these short winter days I get to see the sunrise on my way to work.

(The bad part is that I never have extra time on my way to work, so I have to take blurry pictures out my car windows.)

And on the very same day, on my way home, I get to see the sun set.

(And on my way home I have the luxury of pulling over to take a picture. Because this just doesn't get old for me.)

Sunrise, Sunset.

I love Wednesdays.

Reasonable Resolutions

2012-01-09T09:39:00.003-05:00

1. Blog less

With Friends Like This

2011-12-28T23:08:00.001-05:00

In addition to this blog I have two other blogs. Both of them are weight loss related. One is years old and has not had an entry in a long time. A really long time. My sisters have access to it.
The other is about six months old. I have one encourager who keeps me honest about my eating and exercising. Last week she gave me a book called Till We Eat Again. A humorous look at diet plans and exercise regimen written in diary form.

Feb 26 I felt an alarming lump below my abdomen...Wasting no time, my overactive imagination immediately had me in the starring role of some two-hanky movie..I felt a surge of self pity. After working so hard and finally beginning to get in shape, could the end be near?...My husband ran to my side, looking pale. I showed him where I felt the lumps. He put his hand there and then just shook his head. "Those are your hip bones, you ninny!" he said. I had hip bones?

Two weeks ago my encourager loaned me this book:

Really. I may never see my hip bones again.

The Project Reveal

2011-12-26T23:27:00.003-05:00

The Project arrived in NYC and the BGITWs have unwrapped it, so I can finally show it to you.

Have you been as anxious to see this as I have been to show it to you?

I think you will have to see all four sides to fully appreciate it.

It fits over a card table and it was frightfully fun to make. My only regret is that I don't have more grandchildren. Oh wait. My other regret is that I don't live close enough to play in it with the ones I have. Have I mentioned lately that the house next door to me is still for sale?

Mary Godmother

2011-12-26T19:00:00.003-05:00

When Mary is described as 'great with child' is that a gross understatement considering how great the Child was?

Be Our Guest

2011-12-26T18:57:00.000-05:00

These pinecones are some of our oldest Christmas decorations. They are from the pine trees in the church yard in Fort Payne, AL. Home of the ALABAMA band (Christmas in Dixie?) and our first cross-cultural ministry experience.

This year they appear in the guest room. Last year I ran Christmas out of the guest room. I gathered and wrapped presents on the bed. I unpacked Christmas boxes and left the boxes there. I kept the door closed. This year I kept the room guest ready. Just in case you wanted to stay over. I mean the room is complete with western art (which I carefully selected from local artists at local yardsales).

And a few doilies. Because nothing says welcome like a doily.

The Goob has the walk clear. So if you are thinking you would like to sleepover, just come on by. We're ready.

Back on Tour

2011-12-26T18:37:00.001-05:00

The Big room is a mix of old and new.

A new use for old letters brought me some joy.

A new nativity that the STP spied in Williamsburg. It is good to have good memories of Williamsburg.

An old snowman inspiring me to zumba with him.

A new place to hang the old stockings with care.

One old bird ornament.

One new bird ornament.

The usual cookie tray.

The old prophecy, holding new promise.

The tree is just a little older than the Goob. One old dog with no new tricks. Don't have plans to take the tree down any time soon so stop in and see for yourself. Plenty of room for new and old friends.

House Tour

2011-12-19T09:59:00.000-05:00

My house is not on the Dodge City house tour. So I am going to give you a peek inside. This is just inside the front door. The front room is green and silver this year. I also have a mercury glass bowl of green pears on the coffee table. Like real pears that you can eat. Genevieve from HGTV would be proud of me.

And here are a few details you might not notice at first glance.

This little nested bird has been around along time. He usually nests on the tree. This is his first time in the front room. Charming, if I must say so myself.

The chandelier is pretty much the same as last year, although I did add two green balls procured this summer at a yard sale. Those frames on the wall have Christmas cards in them. They have been hanging on the wall just like that since last Christmas. A big time saver, and if you sit with your back towards them, you really don't notice them in June.

I took a picture of the whole room but when I went to post it I noticed the vacuum cleaner sitting in the middle of the room. (Whose vacuum is that?) And the theme here is things I don't notice.

Like this lovely tableau on the kitchen windowsill. Which includes a paint can opener, a miracle grow spoon, a rock, and all the Betty Crocker coupons that the STP faithfully clips. (Among other things.)

Convicted by the picture, I added a few trees full of hugs and kisses. (The STP added a few BC coupons before I could snap the new picture.)

The rest of the clutter I moved to the kitchen counter, where it really isn't noticable.

I'm home all day. If you don't stop by to see me, I will be ~~forced~~ glad to show you through the big room. Stay tuned.

What Happens in the Attic...

2011-12-18T21:26:00.000-05:00

..stays in the attic.

Because this guy isn't talking.

Fortunately, just a dot of Elmer's is all it takes to get him back on the tree for another year.

Take a Picture

2011-12-15T13:23:00.001-05:00

Last year we had our Christmas picture in August. Complete with icicles. But it is not usually that easy. Usually we have multiple tries. Multiple less-than-satisfying tries. Because I always have an idea. You know, a great plan. Which never really comes to fruition. Some years we have foregone the picture altogether and opted for a capturing the year in song.
So this year I had a picture of the extended family wearing matching red vests that I conseriously considered using. And a picture of the three of us wearing matching glasses. But neither of them fit the idea in my head. The one where we are on the front porch in the snow looking happy and healthy. The one picture that captures the essence of the well adjusted, moderately successful family that I would like you to believe we really are.
So to that I end I scheduled a photo session. As in I said to the Goob and his dad on the way out the door, "If you come directly home after school, we can take our Christmas picture on the front porch before it gets dark."
So after school, and as dark clouds gathered, the front porch looked like this:

Relatively festive and devoid of human lifeforms.

Not to be deterred, I proceeded to take pictures of my empty front porch, cursing the lifeforms who did not bother to even show up. Slightly disheartened, I had just amped up my pity party when the Goob appeared.

And no one can really put the kabash on a pity party like the Goob.

So we posed for a few mother/son shots.

(Which I believe was as much to the amusement of passersby as it was to us.) Because obviously the Goob and I are just the types to be doing body building poses on the front porch.

We were kind of caught up in the moment when the STP arrived.

Which brought us almost back to reality. Okay, lets go with a slightly western look. I'll get my hat, says the STP.

When we were finally all together we snapped this picture of ourselves.

Which wasn't bad for a first try. Three smiling lifeforms. Two glowing orbs. One horse.

If this doesn't say happy well adjusted family relocated from Mars to Dodge City, I don't know what will. So we decided to just go with it. Besides, it was getting dark.

Joy to the World, Partner.

A Few Things

2011-12-12T13:24:00.000-05:00

A few things I want you to know.
1. My fingertips are like human velcro. It's from a combination of my heredity, my location in a high plains desert, and my job which requires me to wash my hands a thousand times a day. It makes it difficult to work with felt.
2. My project, which is made entirely from felt (and one three liter pop bottle), is essentially done. I had to outsource one little part, but the main part is ready. I have tried it on several times and taken a dozen pictures of it. However, because it is a secret I can not share any of them with you right now.
3. I am having a hard time keeping this secret.
4. Okay, here is another sneak peek. Cause I will burst if I can not show someone.

If these are not your initials, the project is not for you. Sorry.
If I am not your Grandmother, this project is not for you. Sorry.
(If you are still hoping against hope that this project is for you, maybe you should draw a Venn diagram.)

I am going to put the project in a box and mail it this week. That is if I can get it unstuck from my velcro fingers. If I can not get unstuck I will be mailing myself to NYC.
P.S. If you do not live in New York, this project is not for you.
P.S.S. Nancyann--review your Venn diagram. You are not my grandchild. Sorry.

A Little Christmas

2011-12-07T23:36:00.001-05:00

I put the candles in the windows last evening. I gathered up the snowflakes from the front yard and flowerbeds where they blew last weekend. I plan to rehang them on the prorch tomorrow morning. I thought about getting the boxes down from the attic. And that's about it.
The Goob came home disappointed the other day because his Geometry teacher was not using the Christmas song, I Need A Little Christmas in her homework problems.
Me: Did you need a little Christmas?
Goob: Right that very minute.
And kudos to Amidala for her little Christmas.

Sweet Float

2011-12-06T21:32:00.001-05:00

Last year God and I had an extended conversation concerning the church float in the 'we can't call it Christmas parade' in Dodge City. This year the conversation was much shorter.

Me: Waddaya think about a float?
God Himself: Anything change since last year?
Me: Okay then.

So we fashioned an oversized candy cane from irrigation pipe, and gigantic sourballs from exercise balls, and in keeping with the Candyland theme we handed out candy canes with this little poem attached.

A significant symbol of Christmas
Is the simple candy cane.
It's shape is the crook of the shepherd
One of the first who came.

The lively peppermint flavor is
The regal gift of spice.
The white is Jesus' purity.
The red is sacrifice.

The narrow stripes are friendship,
And the nearness of his love.
Eternal, sweet compassion
A gift from God above.

The candy cane reminds us all
Of just how much God cared.
And like His Christmas gift to use
It's meant to be broken and shared.

We didn't win any prizes this year. But God is always pleased with obedience and I think even more so when it comes without a fight, so we are calling this a win.

On a side note: We were having hot chocolate and a little fellowship after the parade and they had to come and ask us to move our float. Because it was the only one still left in the middle of the street. Because if you know anything about our church you know we are never in a hurry to leave.

Photo Shoot

2011-12-05T23:46:00.001-05:00

Princess Amidala and my favorite SIL travelled across the country to spend Thanksgiving with us.

And I took these great pictures so I would remember the week.

What? Just one picture of the princess' backside while she shoots a handgun?

Oh, no. I got this one of her with the rifle as well.

And this one of the mud she and I kept stepping in.

And this one of the beer can we shot right through. And that is all.

Sometimes I have such a good time and make such precious memories that I neglect to record them.

The End of Time

2011-12-05T23:23:00.001-05:00

Although the Goob successfully completed the math unit on 'time' in elementary school, he has never really mastered telling time using a analog clock. The result of growing up in a primarily digital world where the time is readily available on the video player and his cellphone. He doesn't understand the concepts of 'quarter after' or 'five of'. So even though I have a traditional kitchen clock on the wall, he uses the clock on the microwave when he is in the kitchen.
The other day I was reheating something in the microwave, when the Goob walked through the kitchen.

Goob: Oh, I'm late.
Me: For what?
Goob: Evidently for everything.

Coming Soon in a Box

2011-12-05T23:16:00.001-05:00

I am still working on my Christmas project. Because I learned from last year (when I built a large heavy wooden project that cost a half a boatload to ship to my favorite brother), I am using a lighter building material this year. Here is a sneak peek.

When the Dodge City Postmaster asks me if there is anything flammable in the box, will I have to mention a fire-breathing dragon?

Princess Amidala Came to Visit

2011-11-28T23:37:00.001-05:00

Things you should know about my youngest daughter:
1. She is a great house guest
2. She has a great sense of humor (much like my own...)
3. Her husband eats my cooking
4. Our toenails are the same color (Green With Envy)
5. She gives great hugs
6. I did not take enough pictures of her while she was here
7. I miss her like crazy

Thanksgiving Morning

2011-11-24T09:41:00.001-05:00

The turkey is in the oven. Stuffed. The cranberry jello salad is complete. The pumpkin sandwich cake is ganached. Let the festivities begin.

92. Airplanes that travel across the country in mere hours.
93. Hearing my baby girl sing praises
94. Being able to sing next by her
95. Stuffing and cranberry jello salad like my mom makes
96. Sweet potato casserole like the STP's mom made
97. A day to give thanks
98. That I do not have any need for Black Friday deals
99. Finishing things on my list
100. Finishing the list

My Mistake

2011-11-21T13:18:00.001-05:00

86. Zumba (because its good to burn some calories before the day really starts)
87. Mistakes (like a jar of crunchy peanut butter that the Goob won't eat)
88. Oatmeal Cranberry Peanut Butter Flourless Cookie Recipes (and all the ingredients on hand to make them--even crunchy peanut butter)
89. Whistling tea kettles (because warm cookies are even better with a cuppa tea)
90. Adaptations (like mini-chocolate chip oatmeal peanut butter flourless cookies)
91. Sharing (flourless cookies with the gluten-free STP and the recipe with you)

peanut butter cookies

1 16oz jar of crunchy peanut butter (Or 2 cups creamy p.b.--if you never make mistakes)
1 cup light brown sugar
1 cup granulated sugar
2 large eggs
2 teaspoons baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt (I omitted this by mistake. Oops!)

Add ins:
1 1/2 cups rolled oats
1 cup dried cranberries

Heat oven to 350F. Line baking sheets with parchment paper. Mix the first six ingredients until smooth. Fold in the add ins.
Shape the dough into balls, place on prepared sheets. Using the tines of a fork, flatten each ball, creating a crisscross pattern.
Bake, until puffed and golden, 10-12 minutes. Let cool slightly on the baking sheets, then transfer to a wire rack to cool ~~completely~~ enough to not burn your mouth.
Enjoy.

Note: Optional add ins:
1 cup broken salted pretzels
1 cup chopped chocolate covered toffee bar
This option sounds absolutely wonderful although not gluten-free. Still and all, I may have to pick up some Heath Bits at the grocery store by mistake.

Little Things, Big Thanks

2011-11-18T17:37:00.001-05:00

76. Discount codes
77. Freshly fallen snow
78. Footprints in freshly fallen snow
79. Anticipation
80. Early out on Friday afternoon
81. One day until Thanksgiving vacation
82. Muppets, especially Statler and Waldorf
83. Sleeping lap dogs
84. Kisses and hugs
85. Chocolate

75%

2011-11-17T00:22:00.001-05:00

71. DVR
72. succulents
73. snow
74. cute flats
75. stylish sweaters

One Day--Real Simple

2011-11-16T23:06:00.001-05:00

I tore the page right out of the November issue. Real Simple's guide to getting your shopping done in one day.

And I tried to follow the plan as closely as possible. Including oatmeal for breakfast. Because nothing says Christmas like fiber, protein, and healthy fats. I wore my stylish new sweater and my cute flats. And I think they did boost my self-confidence. I had my coupons and my list compiled. I had no companions. I arrived at my first store at 10:00 am.

Buy something inexpensive first. Check. Get in, get out. Toys R Us in under 10 minutes?!? Check. Steer Clear of Attractive Sales People. Check.

Avoid the main entrance by entering a side door. Check. (Although I would have benefited by exiting the same door I entered, thus saving the time I spent looking for my car.) Pay for purchases in less crowded areas of the store like men's underwear. Check.

Lunch at 1pm. I opted for the chicken snack wrap at McD's (and the protein rich salad later in the day for supper.) NO carboydrate-laden picks for me. At 2pm I was supposed to perk myself up with a manicure or a massage.

A free chair massage at Bed, Bath, and Beyond. Check and Recheck.

Add in a stop at the fabric store and a shopping cart full of all the ingredients for a project. Could this day be any more fun? They were playing "I'll Be Home For Christmas" in the store, but I had Katy Perry's "Firework" in my head. 124 beats per minute and me moving quickly and efficiently. (I think I was just doing my zumba moves in my head, but I could have gotten a little carried away.)

I picked up the STP after lunch. Office Max and two Sporting Good Stores later he had broken the Get in, Get Out rule, and the Don't talk to Attractive Salespeople rule. (And he had steak and mashed potatoes for supper.) But meet your spouse for supper was strongly suggested, and I have to admit he is good company.

And we multitasked and ate at a restaurant that offered a $10 bonus with our gift card purchase.

At the end of the day, after just one additional order online, I was finished with my Christmas shopping. If I didn't live 2 hours from civilization I could have gotten my wrapping done as well. As it was I just enjoyed the sleigh ride home.

Let it snow. Let it snow. Let it snow.

William Reuben

2011-11-15T00:36:00.001-05:00

Bilirubin crystals in an unstained urine.

I think I missed my calling to laboratory textbook illustrating.

Ein herzliches Dankeschön

2011-11-14T22:39:00.001-05:00

Something bizarre is going on in my blog world. Typically I have about 12 'views' a day. You know, on a good day. But last week there was a big jump in my views. And most of them are from my Valentine's day post from 2009. ( I linked to it just in case you don't remember my tutorial on ice fishing.)

Actually I have several posts on ice fishing. Pre-ice fishing and Post-ice fishing. Even one or two on fishing the STP out of the ice. Clearly, I am somewhat of an authority on ice fishing.

The other bizzare turn in Blog world is my audience. Which is typically 3 of my children, 3 of my siblings, 3 of my friends, and 3 bored people who have arrived by googling things like 'brother-in-law day' and 'birthday cake rabbit'.

Until this week--when the majority of my readers are in Germany. (My mother's maiden name isn't Weinzierl for nothin'.)
I think its just a matter of time before I go completely viral and have my first book deal--Ms. Brenda's Guide to Life and Fishing
So I would like to take this opportunity to welcome and thank my German readers and mention to them that I also have a good deal of knowledge on fly fishing, including fly tying.

In addition to (61.) Germany, I am thankful for:
62. My Discover Card
63. Diet Pepsi
64. Free shipping
65. The color turquiose
66. Bacon
67. My grandbabies
68. My parents
69. My girls
70. Plans

Tomorrow I plan to put the Real Simple Christmas Shopping Done in a Day plan into effect. Wish me luck.

A Yesvember Day At Work

2011-11-12T22:01:00.001-05:00

51. Alarm clocks
52. Deer who stay off the road
53. Early morning phlebotomists
54. Quality control that is all within 2 sd
55. Free hot chocolate
56. Lunch with the boss
57. One completed validation plan
58. Staphylococcus lugdunensis (Not thankful to have it, just thankful to identify it-- 'cause its fun to say)
59. A good picture of bilirubin crystals to add to my crystal collection (You will have to wait until I get home from work to post the pic.)
60. Overtime pay

Thanks Be

2011-11-11T21:38:00.001-05:00

41. Homemade potato soup
42. Candlelight
43. Hot bubble baths
44. Chocolate milk made with Quik
45. Kleenex
46. Spending the evening with my husband
47. Two couches
48. The Big Room
49. The Story
50. Constructive criticism

When I say "JoePa"

2011-11-10T10:08:00.001-05:00

Just wanted to say it is a sad week to be a Penn State alumnus.

Joe Paterno coached Penn State football when my dad (finally) graduated with his engineering degree. Between the time my oldest brother was born in Happy Valley and when he graduated (despite a stint of disciplinary probation) with his first degree (in what we thought might be his career as a professional student) Joe Paterno had become the iconic head coach. JoePa coached football at PSU when my baby sister fell in love there on her way to getting her landscape ~~archetechure~~ ~~archetecture~~ architecture degree. (Despite my own PSU education, a course of study I can't even spell!) When my other brother's mother sent him off to Penn State, it was not to play football, but to get his degree in something that would make him a productive member of society. When he graduated, Joe Paterno was still there.

I remember the last time Joe Paterno missed a PSU football game. Back (in the dark ages) when I was a student on campus. His son was injured in a trampoline accident and his choice was family over football. The football faithful questioned that decision. I was raised by a dad who would have made the same decision for any one of his kids. A dad who consistently chose family over career. I admired Joe Paterno's decision then.

As the mom of a fifteen year old son, I understand the outrage surrounding Penn State this week.
As an alumnus (even one who still does not know the words to the Alma Mater), I am just sad.

A Particularly Easy Day To Be Thankful

2011-11-09T17:47:00.000-05:00

31. Sunshine
32. Snow capped mountains
33. The color brown (without which most of Wyoming would be invisible)
34. Roast beef
35. Company for supper
36. Leftovers
37. Hay bales
38. A job
39. Mail
40. Buttons

Random Thankfulness

2011-11-08T23:37:00.000-05:00

26. Seedless grapes
27. Big brothers
28. Clean laundry
29. New sheets
30. Days off

There Are No Bakeries Here

2011-11-08T20:05:00.000-05:00

I once had a list of things I should teach my kids before I launched them. Things like how to balance a checkbook and how to bait a fish hook. I finally just bought the two oldest each a book and sent them on their way. I trusted them to pass the books back and forth and eventually on to their little sister. The books had information on how to poach an egg. And other invaluable information I didn't have time to pass on. A mother can only do so much. But clearly somewhere along the way we missed the info on parchment paper.

And clearly it is information they needed. As evidenced by the amazing birthday cake ~~fiasco~~ (Note 9:15pm) of September 2011.
Step #1 Follow the directions:

Step #2 Cut parchment to fit pans.

Step #3 Note that parchment paper lines just the bottom of the pan. I sprayed the pan with cooking spray before I put the parchment paper in the pan.

Let's review.

Right way:

Wrong way:

TaDa! The cake comes out of the pan easily, in one piece, and shaped like the pan.

Sorry I did not give you this before you left home. Maybe you should come back for a little bit.

25%

2011-11-07T17:46:00.000-05:00

18. Monday morning zumba
19. Morning conversations with the Goob
20. Walks with the SLD
21. Real international workers
22. Mango fruit smoothies in downtown Dodge City
23. Lunch with the STP
24. Thankful daughters
25. Afternoon naps

Alternate Endings

2011-11-07T17:23:00.000-05:00

Goob (Upon waking this am): Don't tell me. I know how the game ended. One second left. Roethlisberger pass complete to the endzone. Steelers win.
Me: I thought you saw the end of the game.
Goob: I did. I just like that ending better.

Me: People in Pittsburgh are calling in sick this morning. And they are being meaner to their kids.
Goob: And to their moms.

Me: Aren't you glad we know it is just a game?
Goob: Yeah. Of course, if we had won it would be a matter of pride, and dominance, and who is the better man.
Me: Exactly.

Yesvember-(The Positively Thankful Month)

2011-11-05T00:37:00.000-04:00

Is it just me or is Christmas coming earlier every year? The last trick-or-treater wasn't off the porch yet, and Toys R Us was on the TV making me feel like I was behind.
So I am changing the month from NOvember to YESvember. Today I say YES to the following:

11. Seafood Friday at the Historic Dodge City Hotel. (I ate all the food I saw and then requested to see the huckleberry cheesecake.)
12. My pedometer. (Even though I know 70,000 steps will not counteract the slice of cheesecake.)
13. Cruise control. (Reveling in the fact the the flashing lights in my rear view mirror were NOT directed at me this time.)
14. Rubberbands. (While reviewing my original thankful list from 2006, I noticed rubberbands made the list. At work I have these great orange rubberbands. They make me happy in an office supply sort of way.
15. The color orange. (Orange applied to almost anything makes it better.)
16. Reuben sandwichs. (Nice try, Arby's. You made me hungry for the real thing.)
17. Heated car seats. (Even though the car book has 6 warnings about things that could go wrong with them, and things not to do in them. And what not to wear while sitting in them.)

Let's just pick it up here next time.

Six and Beyond

2011-11-03T12:47:00.001-04:00

Something about a gratitude attitude that changes your focus. Sensing a change coming...
6. My sense of humor. Spent a few quality minutes with the Goob before school this morning. Shared a laugh or two.
7. My sense of touch. Came back from dropping the Goob off at school and spent a few quality minutes snuggling with the STP.
8. My sense of smell. In between making the Goob's lunch and making love I made a pan of brownies. The whole house smells like chocolate.
9. My sense of taste. Debating whether I should indulge it with a cup of chai latte accompanied by a brownie...
10. My sense of right and wrong. Would it be wrong to serve the brownies to company without having taste tested them first?
That's exactly what I thought.

A Slow Start

2011-11-03T00:49:00.001-04:00

I am aware it is November. And tradition has it that I will list 100 things I am thankful for. But I am having a hard time getting started.
The STP has been sick for two weeks. I am thankful he is not dead.
My cold sore that lasted two weeks healed up just after the STP got sick. So I have not been kissed for a month. And last night I accused him of breathing on my pillow. I am thankful that we are still sleeping together.
I got my flu shot so I would not get sick. My shoulder has hurt ever since I got the shot. No flu but bursitis in my left shoulder. I am thankful for Aleve and physical therapy.
I cleaned the bathroom. You know the kind of cleaning where you even do the carpet. The kind of cleaning that causes your children to develop projectile vomiting within 8 hours. No projectile vomiting for the Goob, just a bloody nose. I am thankful he did not have the stomach flu.

I think that's five. It's a start.

Belly, Belly Button

2011-11-02T20:25:00.000-04:00

Impossible things my Zumba instructor says:
Put your belly button to your spine.

Sure, as soon as I get my elbow out of my ear...

Black Out

2011-11-01T10:51:00.000-04:00

So was I right about the black pumpkins?

The only question is whether the set designers on MNF on ESPN read women's magazines or just my blog.

In honor of full disclosure I think I need to mention that if you paint your pumpkins black and let them sit in the sun they will absorb enough heat to prematurely bake them and start the rotting process inside their black skins.

Then you will have to turn them around and carve their face on their back sides. (Which can lead to Zachary's Disease.)

Excuse me while I haul my black pumpkin to the dumpster...

A Little Spooky

2011-10-31T21:54:00.001-04:00

A HALLOWEEN GUIDE from a Mom who's been there--

Start your day with the traditional holiday themed pancakes.

Wear ORANGE. (In Dodge City an orange bandana is worth extra points.)

Watch a horror film, or SKIN SOMETHING ALIVE. Because I am really into this, I skinned BABY carrots.

AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

Get your treats ready. If you get 14 or less trick or treaters, go for the full size bars. Do not give anything remotely healthy. Trust me, there will be no health conscious children ringing your doorbell.

Carve your Jack-0-Lantern. Turn off your porch light long enough to get a spooky picture.

SMILE!

Leave your porch light on as long as possible and hand out as much candy as possible. Do not begrudge candy to tall children with pillowcases. What did you buy the candy for if not to give it away?

Eat any leftovers as soon as possible. You don't want it hanging around tempting you tomorrow, do you?

Encourage your children to eat their candy as fast as possible. No use dragging this on for days. If they have more candy than they can eat in a day, they have too much candy. I doubt this is really the case.

There you have it. All the essentials. What to eat, what to wear, what to do. Glad to be of service.

Cross It Off

2011-10-30T22:22:00.000-04:00

Okay, this afternoon I tackled the car book. Which might in fact contain Important Information on Safety, Operation and Maintenance.

(It might be hard, however, to prove it by me.)

Here I am multitasking. Oh yes I am. I am reading the car book and watching the Steelers and the Broncos.

Here is some of what I uncovered during the brief time my eyes were open.. The Owner's Manual was written by technical writers. Who may or may not speak English as their first language.

The Owner's Manual has a good number of pictures. Most of which are warnings of things not to do.

I thought this one meant "Don't even try to figure out your Lighting Control Lever", because it was followed by 4 full pages of instructions on how to turn on your headlights. Including this chart:

The STP tried to explain it to me. IF my ignition is on, my engine is off, my Lighting Control Lever switch is set to auto, and it is dark outside, then my D.R.L.s will be OFF. IF my ignition is on, my engine is on, my Lighting Control Lever is switched to Little Lights, and it is light outside, then my D.R.L.s will be ON. This plus however many combinations are statistically possible from a chart this size.

IF I want my ignition on, my engine on, my switch set to off, it is dark outside and I want my D.R.L.s OFF...Sorry, no can do.

Except my favorite airplane mechanic gave me a little car tip this morning at church. And remarkably my car thinks like a Camaro. So, thanks, Planemech, for solving my lighting dilemma.

I went a little further in the car book.

Until I saw this. Which is just wrong.

So I put my car book back in the car, where it said to keep it at all times.
I might get used to kilometers per hour.

Car Book

2011-10-29T00:17:00.000-04:00

'Car book' has been on my 'to do' list for a month. I never read it, I never cross it off the list, and I just keep transferring it to my new 'to do' list.
The car book came with my new car. (In September.) I imagine it tells me how to use the radio, the windshild wipers, and the lights. It explains when to change the oil, what grade of gasoline I should use, and how the door locks work. I could use some of this information. The lights have four settings. I just choose one. And there are lights. I guess I really should know which lights I have lit. I have considered getting out of the car and looking at the lights but I am afraid the car will lock me out if I have the key inside and the car is running. So when I warm the car up on frosty mornings I have to leave a door ajar so I do not lock myself out. It takes a little longer to warm up with the door open. I think it might also appear to invite car thieves. They probably explain this in the car book.
This week the STP is deathly ill, so I had to pump my own gas. And I did that just fine. But when I tried to reset the odometer, I changed the display from miles to kilometers. Evidently repeatedly pushing the button is not the way to reset the odometer. So now my digital display is in kilometers. And in my head I have to go, "If 5k = 3.1mi how many miles are in 58k?" And I can't do that in my head. So I am putting 'Car book' on my list of things to do this weekend.
On the upside, I appear to be getting great mileage on this tank of gas.

Don't Stand Still

2011-10-25T12:07:00.000-04:00

Or I will paint you. Along with a return to cooking, fall obviously brings an irrepressible desire to paint things. So far this month, in addition to the skelemingoes and my toenails, I have painted a jungle's worth of animals for the church nursery.

And two pumpkins. Because I had left over black paint.

And because, if you believe the ladies' magazines, black pumpkins are all the rage this fall.

And because there is something wrong with me.

And today I am painting my project from yesterday. The STP helped me build something. Actually we built two somethings--one for me and one for my favorite son-in-law. (just seeing if you guys are out there :) ) I am painting my something green and I am finishing his something with a light oak stain and polyurethane.

I am trying to keep the something a surprise until Thanksgiving. When my favorite son-in-law will visit and I will present him with a large wooden object to take back in his suitcase.

Note to my other sons-in-law: If you will bring my daughters and grandbabies to Thanksgiving, I promise not to paint anything for you. And it could be just the thing to elevate you to favorite status. Just saying.

SFG Wrap-up

2011-10-24T23:55:00.000-04:00

Using these last beautiful fall days to clean out the garden and flower beds and boxes. Last week I cleaned out the SFG. A few garden notes:
The late developing peppers developed too late to be of any value. A waste of 4 square feet.
It was a better year than last for onions.
Pumpkins are more fun to grow than zucchini.
Chocolate cherry tomatoes do NOT taste like chocolate covered cherries.

The last veggies out of the garden were the carrots. My square foot garden book says you can leave them in the ground, but, really, there was just enough left for a meal for a family of three (one of whom never eats vegetables). So I harvested and sliced and cooked them up for supper.

And that's when I started having second thoughts. Because I remembered a micro lab from PSU where we innoculated raw carrot slices with a virus that caused carrot tumors. And what always bothered me about that lab was not that people like my lab partner had access to cancer causing viruses, but that carrot cells were alive long after they were pulled from the earth. And so I was about to boil my carrots alive. And all those carrots I munched right out of the garden--I had eaten them alive. Bordering on cannabalism if you think too hard about it.
So I moved on to think about other things. Like why that carrot tumor lab was one of the only labs I could remember.
Actually, I can remember one more. A physiology lab in which we were doing some sort of surgery on a rat and my lab partner and I over-anesthetized our rat. And he died. And the grad assistant gave the rat mouth to mouth resucitation and that gave my lab partner and I a fit of giggles. Which irritated the life out of the grad assistant. And the rat stayed dead. Which made it easier to do the surgery. Because I have an aversion to slicing up living things.
And that reminded me of the movie scene where the student saves the lab frogs by aiding their escape. Only I couldn't place the scene. Which led me on a search from Maryland to Googleland. Amidala couldn't place it. The Goob couldn't place it. Google and the STP knew exactly where it was. The STP found it in his databank faster than Google. I rewarded him by serving him carrots. Dead carrots.
It's a wonder I get anything done.

Deer Me

2011-10-16T22:44:00.000-04:00

Opening day was successful for the STP. If you look closely, you can see him here with his prey. (He is right under the orange hat, in case you can't see him in his camo.)

I myself have seen 5 bucks in the last 4 days. On Thursday morning I saw 4 on my walk along the dike. Two of them were doing that male head butting thing like you see on Monday Night Football. I was close enough to hear the clicking of their antlers. I wished I had my camera with me, but then I remembered that I wouldn't get the picture anyway, so I just enjoyed the sight. Then this evening I saw the biggest buck EVER cross the street in front of my house and step over the neighbor's fence into the back yard. It crossed the road in front of two truckloads of camo overloaded hunters. They pulled over to get a better look. But I saw him first. I am a great hunter. And a pretty good finder.

But the STP is the only one of us putting meat in the freezer.

I Do NOT Collect Flamingoes

2011-10-07T23:59:00.002-04:00

Went to the big home center in the city this week. Bought some waterproofing for the front porch. And 99 cents worth of joy in can.

Oh, the Aunt Vi in me couldn't wait to get home and try it on.

I only had a few hours this evening, but fortunately I had the fast drying variety of joy in a can.

And so in just a few minutes I had two pre-skelemingoes drying in the north yard.

And before I got ready for bed, I had two skelemingoes ready to set out in the front yard.

Total cost of the project: $1.24.
Appreciation for garage saling friends (Thanks E,S,K, and B) who share the bounty: Boundless
Satisfaction of a project completed: Priceless.

Holy Smoke

2011-10-04T00:25:00.001-04:00

You know the STP and I have come to an agreement on how we will handle our ~~imminent~~ ~~eminant~~ ~~imanant~~ ~~nevermind~~ deaths and our final arrangements. Because the STP has all the luck, he will probably die first and there is a good chance that I will be left holding the ashes. But now I am resting easier because now I have a plan.
For a fee, two retired game wardens will load the STP's ashes into shotgun shell cases and put them in a box and put that box into another box and mail them to myself. And when they arrive I'll put them on the mantle. (It's brilliant, brilliant, brilliant, I tell you! Genius, I say!) Or I can fire them into whatever targets or turkeys I see fit.

Me: What's a good price for shotgun shells?
STP: I don't have a shotgun.

Of course. He will figure out a way to get a new gun out of this deal.

Some of my favorite parts of the deal are that, for an additional fee, I can get a "mantle-worthy, finished, wooden handcrafted box with a label" and that "all sales are final."
All sales are final.
Is it sad to be looking forward to a funeral of someone you can't imagine living without?

One Weird Old Tricky Tip

2011-10-02T11:06:00.000-04:00

Just wondering...
if I wore my butt-busting shoes on the wrong feet could I walk off my front butt?

Indestructable

2011-10-01T09:58:00.000-04:00

All I want for Christmas:

Goin' Into Town

2011-09-27T23:37:00.000-04:00

What? You can't buy bear spray at your Walgreens?

Out of My Mind

2011-09-27T12:06:00.000-04:00

I grew my own zucchini this year in the SFG.

And I made this zucchini casserole that smells so good when it is baking and tastes like fall.

Summer is officially over when Ms. Brenda starts to cook again.

Photos

2011-09-27T12:00:00.000-04:00

Just so you could see the pants were plenty long. In fact some of the longest ones there.

I took these blurry pictures all by myself, because that's the kind of mom I am.

Brothers?

2011-09-25T22:36:00.002-04:00

The more weight Ben Roethlisberger gains the more he looks like my baby brother. Oddly, my other brother's look alike is Jim Carrey. And I have another brother. Who doesn't look like he's related to either Ben R. or Jim C. Maybe I was adopted after all.

Order in the Court

2011-09-23T20:59:00.001-04:00

Ever since he started school, the Goob has had a plan. And the plan was to drop out after eighth grade. His comment on preschool, "There are all these teachers telling you what to do all day--like you are their slave." At the end of fourth grade he declared, "Halfway done." We never made a big deal out of it, because it is always easier to push through if the end is in sight. Plus, by the time he was in sixth grade it was highly questionable if he would even reach eighth grade. So when the time came to sign up for high school classes we held our collective breaths. And the Goob finished his freshman year. And here we are at the beginning of his sophomore year and not only does he still go to school, but he is also the class treasurer for the second year in a row. And this week, because wonders never cease, he is on the homecoming court. Let me repeat that for you. The Goob is a homecoming attendant representing the sophomore class. Sadly, when he told me, I thought he misunderstood the whole homecoming process. But then his name was in the paper, so it must be true. Today he rode in the parade--on the back of a convertible.
Me: How did it go?
Goob: Fine.
Me: What did you do? Smile and wave?
Goob: There wasn't much to do. I didn't get to throw anything. I just rode around being attendable.

Tonight he will be on the football field at halftime.
Me: Do you think those pants are too short?
Goob: No.
Me: Well, if your pants are too short it makes you look like a tall geeky nerd.
Goob: Yeah, cause I'm definately not a tall geeky nerd.
Me: And I wouldn't want anyone to think you were.
STP (in his head): Shut your mouth now.
Me(ignoring the STP and my own better judgment): Are you going to wear you tie and your vest?
Goob: I'm leaving now.
Me: Okay, I'll have your tie and your vest in the stands in case you change your mind.
Goob: Good. See you after the game.
Me(unconvincingly): Love you.

His sisters always thought there was the possibility the Goob would end up in court. Pretty much sure they didn't think it would be the homecoming court.

Keeping Up With The Princess

2011-09-22T09:59:00.001-04:00

I did a little project this week involving succulents in the big room. It is not on the same scale as Amidala's fireplace room. But it is finished. And it solved the problem of what to do with my delicate glass birdfeeder and an old pair of trouser socks. Ta da!

The STP and I also went on our own shopping spree and bought me a BRAND NEW CAR!! (Because I already had a pair of butt-busting shoes).

It came with some things I have never had in a car, like a sunroof and heated leather seats. And it came with a few things I haven't had in years, like automatic transmission, cruise control, ...and car payments.

Guest Dogger

2011-09-19T22:25:00.002-04:00

The SLD's first blog

I thoroughly dislike when they pack the cooler. Because when they pack the cooler I end up spending the day in my K-place. They think I do not know the K-place is the kennel. Like I can't spell?

But this morning they said the G-word. Can you believe it? I got to GO.

We were headed to the lake. In the truck. With the boat.

They call this place Sunshine. Aptly named.

I did not like the sound of the engine.

But I got used to it pretty quickly.

It was my job to help the pack leader watch the lines.

And help him pull in the big ones.

But mostly it was my job to stay close to my boy and keep an eye on him.

Because when he drove the boat it looked like this:

And the pack leader had to hold onto his hat.

Finally, I just had to take the wheel myself. Squirrel!

Ah, a great day in the sunshine at Sunshine.

I think it wore my boy out.

I took a little nap myself on the way home. I love that cooler.

HELP! I Need Somebody

2011-09-18T23:33:00.001-04:00

Been awhile since I gave you a book report. I got a little off course this summer in that, while I read, I did not do a good job of keeping track. Here's to getting back on track.
This past week I read The Help by Kathryn Stockert. I read it on Tuesday. I started out reading a chapter as a reward for completing something on my list of things to do on my day off. Some things on the list (like wiping off the kitchen counter) deserved two chapters. I added 'take a bubble bath' to my list because I could read and cross something off my list at the same time. I rewarded myself with two chapters after I dried off for being so smart. By lunchtime I was just settled in on the couch reading.
I usually find a quotable to share with you from each book. The problem with The Help is that there is a quotable about every other page. The second problem is that I was reading a borrowed copy and I could neither dogear nor underline them as I read. (And I could not stop reading long enough to jot them down as I went.) Here is just one I share in honor of all lazy sisters I have known, raised, and been.

Even though she has zero kids and nothing to do all day, she is the laziest woman I've ever seen. Including my sister Doreena who never lifted a royal finger growing up because she had the heart defect that we later found out was a fly on the x-ray machine.

After reading The Help I decided I might never write anything again, because it would be so anemic in comparison.
I decided you should all read the book, because it has the best definition of 'ugly' I have ever encountered. As used in the sentence, "Being tired is no excuse for being ugly." Or, "I don't mean to be ugly, but..." And I couldn't find it when I went back to look for it. So you should be sure to jot it down for me.
And I decided I really need a maid, so I would not have to spend the rest of the week trying to catch up on things I didn't get done on my day off.

Miss You Like Crazy

2011-09-18T23:03:00.000-04:00

Today we talked about Abraham moving to Canaan and the things he gave up. This is just one of my sacrifices.

The Heart of the Mallow

2011-09-17T00:10:00.000-04:00

You should just know that the marshmallows we took up on the mountain came with several warnings. I think it might be because they were jumbo marshmallows. Jumbo marshmallows are so big you should not use them to play chubby bunny.

Let me put them in perspective for you. On the left--a jumbo marshmallow. One the right--a mini marshmallow. The jumbo marshmalllows are so big they come with the above choking hazard warning. Indeed you should not put one in your mouth and try to talk or laugh. The jumbo marshmallows are so big you can hollow them out and drink your hot chocolate out of them.

The jumbo marshmallows are so big you only need only need 2 of them to make a batch of rice krispie treats.

The jumbo marshmallows are so big you can roast them, eat off the browned to perfection melted outside layer, roast them again, eat off the next layer, and repeat three more times.

Jumbo marshmallows are so big, when you catch them on fire on the end of your marshmallow stick you can use it as as a torch to light your way from the campfire to the bathroom.

Jumbo marshmallows are so big that when you step in one (that someone abandoned on the ground after catching it on fire) you are stuck there until the sun comes up.

Once you get used to seeing jumbo marshmallows, regular sized marshmallows look like mini marshmallows.

Regular sized marshmallows are like marshmallow hearts. Soon you can expect to see them marketed as such. And the price will likely increase.

Don't say I didn't warn you.

Note: I have a future post about roasting a chicken, but I got nothing on roasting children.

2011-09-09T23:23:00.003-04:00

How old are you when your grandchildren go to school?

Spend the Night

2011-09-09T23:11:00.000-04:00

A few updates are due from last weekend's fourth annual camping trip to the mountains. This year we borrowed the yurt again and on Saturday night I was especially thankful for the wood stove in said yurt. Because on Saturday night the temperature dipped to 15 degrees in said mountains. And I'm not talking Celsius here. The STP is not really big on camping. Over the three day weekend he spends 24 hours on the mountain and then he comes down and takes a shower and sleeps in his own bed and then he goes back up the mountain for another 24 hours. Conveniently, this year the 15 degree (F) night was the night the STP was not on the mountain. He did build me a pre-fire in the stove before he left. As in all I had to do was strike a match and light the newspaper which would catch the cardboard on fire which would catch the kindling wood on fire, which would catch the pine logs on fire, which would heat the yurt and keep me warm.
9:30 pm I strike the match and the fire roars to life in the stove and I return to join the freezing souls huddled around the campfire. They want to tell me the temperature but I put my fingers in my ears and say, "Blah, blah, blah." Someone says it is already below freezing. I say "I wished you hadn't telled me that."
10:00pm I say goodnight to the freezing campfire souls and head to my yurt. I say I don't want to leave the fire unattended because I don't want the yurt to catch fire. The nice lady in the Taj Mahal camper says if it does I can come in their camper with the heater. I say,"I'm just going to set the thing on fire right now." Instead I add a log to the fire and crawl into my sleeping bag. The Goob is sleeping in his tent. I pray he does not freeze to death. That he has enough sense to come in out of the cold.
1:15am I wake up, either because the fire has quit crackling or because my nose is cold. I add some wood to the stove and coax the coals back into flames. I do the math and decide that I have been asleep for three hours. If the fire lasts three hours, then I will only have to get up once more before morning. I crawl back into my sleeping bag. My toes are cold, but I snuggle in and fall back asleep quickly.
The next time I wake up my nose is cold, my toes are too. I miss the STP. He is a great toewarmer. The fire is reduced to embers in the stove. I check my watch. It says 12:26am. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Either I am in a time warp or I did not pull my sweatshirt cuff back far enough at 11:15pm. Either way, my night just got a lot longer. I add some wood to the fire. I pray that the STP has cut enough wood to last the whole night. I crawl back into my sleeping bag. I try to contort my legs in such a way to put my cold toes against a warmer part of my body. I have less than limited success.
1:48am I am awake again. My nose is cold, my toes are cold, the fire is non-existent, and I have to pee. I try to decide if I am better off staying in my sleeping bag and conserving my body heat, or getting out to feed the fire. I am not good at making decisions. Especially when I have to pee. I decide I will not go all the way to the outhouse. I will go just around the side of the yurt. I pray there are no bears out there. I crawl out of the tent and see that the neighboring campers have left their porchlight on.  And that consequently the side of my tent is well lighted. What are the chances that someone is looking out towards my yurt at 2:00am? I mean, what are the chances. Better than I care to take. The moon has already set. The sky is clear. The stars are awesome. When I get back from the outhouse I add wood to the coals and crawl back into bed.
3:08am My air mattress has significantly less volume at 15 degrees than at 75 degrees. When I am in the middle it is not bad. When I try to sit up on the end, I fall off onto the floor. I can't find my mittens in the tangled mess that is my sleeping bag. I fix the fire. I wish I had warmer socks. I pray for warmer socks. Big thick socks like the STP has. Maybe wool socks. Then I remember that the STP's bag is at the foot of the bed. I (carefully) move to the foot of the bed and search the STP's duffle for socks. SCORE. I pull the STP's thick socks right over my own thin little socks.   I thank God for the socks, but I feel compelled to remind Him they are not wool.  He obviously answered my prayer before I got to the wool part. My toes and nose warm up and I am back to sleep.
4:35 am The fire is out AGAIN. I am low on little wood. It takes me half an hour sitting on the tarp in front of the stove blowing on and reaarranging the coals to coax them back into flames. I put a pan of water on top of the stove. I rearrange my sleeping bag. Everything about me smells like smoke. Miraculously I fall back asleep.
6:00am I have lived through the night and I have to pee again. My big thick socked feet do not fit inside my shoes. I head out to use the bathroom. I don't know what the temperature is but I think it must be 20 below. There is frost on everything.  Including the toilet seat. When I return to the yurt I make myself a cup of hot chocolate, I feed the fire, I crawl back into the center of the bed. If I lift my feet, my butt sinks into the mattress. I put my pillow behind my back. Like a recliner. I pull the covers to my neck and cradle the big warm mug in my hands. I would have taken a picture, but the camera was out of reach and battery power.
I am so proud of myself. Totally convinced that if I had a walled tent with a stove, cut firewood, a flashlight, extra clothing, and a mug of hot chocolate that I could survive a night alone in the wilderness.
8:47am I go the Goob's tent. I say. "Are you alive in there?" He was.

2011-09-06T14:24:00.000-04:00

The kayaks returned to the Mountain and Lake Sibley this weekend for the annual Labor Day Campout. A good time was had by all.

Best Available Alternate Flight

2011-08-27T19:21:00.000-04:00

I was on the East Coast for the earthquake, and I got out just before the hurricane. Because of the 'you can't get there from here' fact of where I live, I had three flights which were carefully choreographed to get me from Rochester NY to the small city an hour from Dodge City via Washington DC and Denver CO in just under 9 hours. The problem was the DELAYED status of my first flight. Which left me begging the flight attendant to open the the door before the plane came to a complete stop on the tarmac in DC and sprinting through the Dulles airport. (I was very glad for my couch to 5k training, because it is roughly 3.1 miles from gate B8 to gate C17.) It was not pretty, but it was effective, as my flight status on my Denver connection was NOW BOARDING. When I finally had a chance to power on my electronic device I was already in Denver, and I had a voice mail from United Airlines saying that because of the delay on my flight from Rochester they had booked me on the best available alternate flights which would have me spend the night in Washington and spend another 24 hours en route. I got just two things to say to that:

1. Clearly they underestimated me.
2. It's good to be home.

Side note: I could tell what city I was in by the people in the airport:
Cody: Older Japanese Americans wearing Yellowstone sweatshirts, Cowboys with hats
Denver: Burly men in camouflage with fly rods as carryons
Cleveland: Amish men in suits
Rochester: Businessmen in suits and ties
Washington, DC: Blurry men, slow people
Denver: Tourists with cowboy hats
Cody: The STP waiting with a kiss and a hug--See #2 above

D.A.D.D.

2011-08-22T22:49:00.000-04:00

Saw this on the front of a t-shirt.
Dads Against Daughters Dating
The STP may have been a member of this organization if he had known of its existence 10 years ago.
The back of the t-shirt said:
If you knew my son you would understand.

Yarn on a Plane

2011-08-21T21:35:00.000-04:00

Lacking a Kindle, I occupied my traveling time today with a skein of yarn and two plastic TSA-approved knitting needles. Sitting in the Cleveland airport, I glanced up to see two 9 year old boys curiously watching me as I wrapped the yarn around my needles and knit and purled to connect the cuff back to the gusset on my slipper.
"Ah", I explained to them, "It's like an old-fashioned video game."

I used to spend hours sitting on the couch knitting when I was a child. Weird.

Cherries in Cups

2011-08-21T21:24:00.000-04:00

You know I have a thing about cherries with stems in little cups. Well, I have found something I like better. Stemless, pitted cherries in a glass measuring cup.

Ready to be folded into gluten free muffin batter.

Baked in reusable silicon muffin cups, served warm from the oven with chai tea.

(Reason # 192 that I'm the STP's favorite wife!)

FYI--I purchased the measuring cup and the baking cups at yard sales this summer. Two things on my mental 'want list' that I was not willing to pay full price for. Because of my new job I had a short garage sale season, but it was a good one.

The Vacuum and Kayak Pictures

2011-08-17T00:13:00.000-04:00

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait 'til tomorrow...

For summer days end, we have learned to our sorrow.

So today was the day to head to the lake.

Because we are just the kind of people who live on the edge, we took the camera out in the kayaks today and took these shots of each other and the front of our kayaks. The STP and I also pulled our kayaks alongside each other and took a few 'facebook' shots of ourselves, but it turns out that bizarre upside down close-ups of our faces are not our most flattering shots. So I will spare you.

(Thinking we need a tandem.)

Day Off Decisions

2011-08-16T13:25:00.000-04:00

Vacuum or kayak?
Not many summer days left. And vacuuming was not even on the list of things I wanted to do this summer.
Lunch packed. Sunscreen slathered.
Guess who's going kayaking!

In Lieu of a Muffler Man

2011-08-12T01:07:00.000-04:00

(Just when you think I cannot top Carhenge.)

Among the wonderful places I visited on vacation was the Mother's Memorial in Ashland, PA. A bronze statue of Whistler's Mother set high upon a hillside since 1938 and dedicated to all mothers past and present. Inspired by a YouTube video, I made my own video of our visit. But I am clueless how to post it. So I will just have to settle for a few still shots.

Because the 4SS know how to plan a good sisters' weekend.

A scary view of Whistler's Mother in Bronze.

I think that says it all.

Are you amazed you didn't even know this existed?

Okay, go ahead and search for the youtube video. It's just like being there.

Teaberry Ice Cream

2011-08-10T11:07:00.000-04:00

in a pretzel cone.

I need to find a local supplier.

Home Food

2011-08-09T17:27:00.000-04:00

Must confess I do not know a lot about economics. Except that the law of supply and demand effects my food choices. Things my body demanded this week (that I was happy to supply):
Galliker's Diet Iced Tea
Lebanon bologna
Potato rolls
Mid's chocolates
Grilled stickies
Smiley cookies
Each of these things has a story and a place and time attached to it. None of them are readily available in Dodge City.
Leaving home again today. Headed home. Have two smiley cookies in my carry-on to ease the transition.

Fit For Ducks

2011-08-06T23:18:00.000-04:00

One full day at the lakehouse.

One day of pouring rain.

This day called for more chocolate.

Pickin'

2011-08-06T23:04:00.000-04:00

The plan to go on the World's Longest Yardsale with my three delightful sisters fell through. But today the four of us did do some antique picking. We were limited by the inability to transport, the amount of money in our wallets, and the thought of explaining our purchases to our husbands. Nonetheless, we returned to the cabin with 2 rubber jar rings, 5 porcelain door knobs (with matching escutcheons!), 4 church pew hat clips, 3 cake plates, a bass drum, and a six foot board (possibly from a pear tree).

total spent $55.25

estimated value $525.25

time with my sisters PRICELESS

All These Trees and Other Reasons To Smile

2011-08-06T17:55:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Pennsylvania.

Park Pics

2011-08-04T18:18:00.000-04:00

Our oldest child, the Slovakian Princess, was our favorite from the start.

Our youngest, the Goob, is our current favorite still at home.

They might have been hatched from the same eggs.

Shark Week

2011-08-04T08:30:00.000-04:00

Celebrated Shark Week with a day wave hopping and boogie boarding in the Atlantic. Ended up looking like lobsters. Obviously not enough slathering or reapplying going on.

Back In Time

2011-08-02T07:36:00.000-04:00

The first time we visited Colonial Williamsburg was kind of like having your teeth extracted without anesthetic (after waiting in long lines in 120 degree weather without any airconditioning, ice, or shade trees).

Yesterday we went back. And we all agreed it wasn't nearly as bad as our memories. There was still some horse hockey. (Claire Marie said, "Those horses should have holded it."),

but there was also dancing in the streets. (and shade trees)

And the wigmakers shop was OPEN!

Of course, there was a tech based scavenger hunt. (and the threat of tar and feathers over our heads)

And the promise of the water park.

But maybe we have all matured a little bit over the past ten years.

So we have taken Colonial Williamsburg off our list of 'places we wouldn't visit again even if they are the last place on earth'.

Who Knows When...

2011-08-01T16:06:00.000-04:00

We haven't posed for a group picture each place we have been, but the vests were just such a nice touch that this one was irresistable. Not sure if this will be the Christmas pic or not. After all, we have 3 more days together.

The Days Are Just Packed

2011-07-30T23:34:00.000-04:00

Started the day by 'running' the family vaca 5K. As I fully expected, I owned the 'women over thirty' category. Hopefully my legs will still work tomorrow.
Bought two tomatoes, an onion, a pepper, 2 dozen ears of corn, and a watermelon at a farmer's market in Yorktown.
Ate lunch at Chick-fil-a.
Went grocery shopping with my 4 children. I don't think I ever took the four of them to the grocery store together. Now I know why.
Made tortilla soup and salad for supper.
Went to Busch Gardens, pushed my favorite grandson in the stroller and watched my favorite granddaughter ride Oscar's Worms in Sesame Street Forest.
Held the STP's hand and watched fireworks.
And I'm on vacation again tomorrow.
Life is good.

Miss Pennsylvania

2011-07-29T23:57:00.000-04:00

Things I've missed:
Galliker's diet iced tea
My Mom's porch
All these trees

Things I have not missed:
Humidity
Traffic cones
Traffic.

This Makes Me Laugh Inside My Head

2011-07-25T23:53:00.000-04:00

Jokes about female bodily functions are not funny. Period.

Glowing Orbs in Dodge City

2011-07-24T23:31:00.001-04:00

What? You thought the concept of Cowboys and Aliens was far-fetched?
Remember I moved here from Mars.

And what is that out in my East Side Garden?

Let's venture closer.

If you dare.

I love it when a plan comes together.

(Total cost of project: $4.00)

Thanks to The Slovakian Princess for the inspiration. You know my heart and I can't wait to wrap my arms around you. In like five days!!

The End of One Glowing Orb

2011-07-24T21:08:00.000-04:00

I pretty much keep the gazing ball people in business all by myself. Its not always my fault although one time I broke two gazing balls within one week. Note: Gazing balls are clearly not designed to be whacked with a shovel handle or to drop 8 feet onto a paved driveway.

These are pictures of my last two gazing balls. This one was a gift from my loving daughters. I've had it over two years.

Right up until the big wind storm in Dodge City last week. Here are the pieces I picked up from the yard.

The coolest thing about this one was that it glowed in the dark, but I never got a good picture of that. So I stopped by the garage on my way to the dumpster. Sad day in Dodge City.

What Are These Doing on the Tour?

2011-07-23T21:49:00.000-04:00

Remember the crispy little yellow and green things in the front pots?

They did just fine for over a month.

And then the inevitable happened.

I left them 2 days in a heat wave and the care of the STP and the Goob. And they're a whole new level of crispy.

Tour the Grounds--High Points

2011-07-23T21:23:00.000-04:00

The portulaca is growing along the sidewalks. They came back from the ones I planted last year. These make me happy in a Grandma Weinzierl sort of way.

These are the Abi's lilies from her fourth grade fundraiser. They have moved three times. They remind me of the garage in South Fork and the girls on the roof. (Go in your house and leave me alone.)

I grew these white coneflowers from seeds. Growing things from seeds is like a miracle thing. It just makes me happy. I have them in purple, too.

These red holly hocks are along the east side of the house. I stole the seeds for these on one of my first walks through town. I planted them where I thought the fence would be. Hollyhocks grow like weeds here in Dodge City. That fact does not make me any less happy to have them growing along my fence.

These next two are in the front flower boxes on the front porch.

They are stunning from the street.

And absolutely beautiful from the porch swing.

Solitary Shakespeare

2011-07-22T22:55:00.000-04:00

Tonight was Shakespeare in the Park in Dodge City. I decided yesterday I would go. The STP decided he needed to work this evening. The Goob decided he needed to be anywhere but in the park this evening. The SLD is not allowed in the park. This has been a park rule since before we moved here. Evidently some people's dogs can not behave themselves in the park. Once I get elected to the Dodge City Council I will have this rule changed. Or at least an exemption granted for the SLD. Clearly this rule should not apply to her. The park would be a delightful place for her to run. And to chase squirrels. And to keep me company for the Merchant of Venice. As it was, I had to cleverly place my lawn chair at the end of a row of strangers and pretend I was with them. Happily, I chose some good looking younger couples to pretend to be friends with. And it was a lovely evening for Shakespeare in the park.
And a lovely evening on the patio. There is a little breeze, so the killer mosquitos are held at bay. The STP is still working. The Goob is still avoiding me. The SLD, who does not hold a grudge, has joined me outside. She is contentedly chewing a bone in the grass circle. Kind of like her own private park. I don't think I could have spent a better evening by myself. But I still missed you.
Tomorrow I am going to tour the grounds in the am. And buy cherries with stems. I don't know how you can stay away.

5K

2011-07-21T21:03:00.000-04:00

Jogged 5K this am.
Just saying.

Run, Silly Little Dog, Run

2011-07-17T19:03:00.000-04:00

Thoughts on running with the dog:
The SLD is eternally hopeful that I will run.
The SLD recognizes my running clothes and my running shoes.
When I am wearing the combination of my running clothes and running shoes, the SLD leaps for joy.
When I mention the words 'go' and 'leash' in the same sentence, the SLD leaps higher.
While I jog at my top speed the SLD walks right beside me. One her eight-inch long legs. (The STP says she has four legs to my two, but I'm not sure that explains this.)((I added the hypen in eight-inch after I previewed this post because without it it may have appeared that the SLD had eight inch-long legs--more caterpillar than dog. Silly indeed.))
While I jog continuously, the SLD stops to sniff things and to pee.
The SLD never makes fun of how slow I run.
The SLD never complains about how far I do or do not run.
When we get home the SLD waits for me to take my shoes off.
The SLD likes my smelly socks.
Like me, the SLD likes to follow a morning run with an afternoon nap.

I am running because of a plan I made for vacation. I planned to run a 5k with my kids. I would have called them all this weekend and said I had changed my mind except for this. Ah, Princess Amidala, how you motivate me. I will be competing in the women over 30 category. (The key is to limit the field.) I expect to be a contender. I can not, however, muster as much excitment about this running thing as the SLD. She's in a class by herself.

Slather and Reapply

2011-07-13T23:14:00.000-04:00

And try not to miss a spot.

Rocketman

2011-07-13T00:45:00.000-04:00

The Goob (and the STP) built a model rocket.

Today was the launch date. (Randomly chosen based on the fact that it was time to get it off the table in the big room.)

The first attempt was less than impressive. 3-2-1 nothing. (Maybe it was because we used rhubarb leaves for the wadding.)

A few adjustments to the ~~detonator~~ launch controller.

3-2-1 again.

And we have liftoff!

It went so high it was out of sight. (I would share the next picture in the series but you know pictures of the sky are not really my thing.)

What I'm really good at is capturing the moment.

And today had a lot of good moments.

In Search of Glowing Orbs

2011-07-11T23:25:00.000-04:00

The Slovakian Princess sent me this inspirational picture because she thought it was a great idea for my east yard. I thought it was genius.

I could just imagine the possibilities.

Then I remembered the size of my east yard and I priced these little glowing orbs at $325-$1000 each. I have to admit they were still attractive because they would float in my pool. Then I remembered that I don't have a pool.

So I was back to the original idea from the Princess. Her orbs were made from a string of Christmas lights and 2 round white light fixture covers supposedly available at most thrift shops for $1-$3. Dodge City has thrift shops. So while I was at work the STP located two perfect sized globes at $2 a piece and then he went fishing. I found one on the kitchen table. The other one was in the garage.

The spooky garage.

In a spooky bucket.

Let's be brave and look inside the bucket. At the spooky soon to be glowing orb.

AAAHHH!!!With the spooky painted clown face!

Nice try, STP, but the paint was not as easily removed as the STP imagined. So while the size was perfect, the spooky clown faced orb had to be returned to the thrift store. And I am still searching for the second orb for my east yard. Because the idea is still genius.

In the meantime, the first perfect orb is out in the east yard.

( Just trying it on.)

I'll update you when there are two of them and they are glowing.

A New Perspective on the SFG

2011-07-11T01:28:00.000-04:00

I hardly ever show you the SFG from this angle.

My favorite farmer's wife (FFW) saw my SFG for the first time last week. She said she has never seen such a little garden. Ever. Coming from a farmer's daughter and a farmer's wife who has seen a lot of gardens over the years, I am taking that as a compliment. I have been harvesting lettuce for weeks. I have planted a second planting.

The rhubarb, which up to this point I believed was a miniature variety, is coming into its own in the front corner. I am thinking I could make a quarter recipe of rhubarb crunch.

The peppers have blossoms, although mostly they just drop off the plants after they bloom. Maybe they are late summer producers.

I harvested some uber-baby carrots today. Uber-baby carrots are about half an inch long and about an eighth of an inch thick at the top. (Which is another way of saying that I thinned the carrots and ate the ones I pulled out.) I shared one with the Goob. It is the first time in his life he has eaten a whole carrot.

Possible the most exciting development is in the zucchini square foot. The plant itself does not look good. It is growing slowly and the leaves are turning brown. I did not expect this, as zucchini seems to be a crop that never does poorly. But today it too had blossoms. Oh, baby, I have visions of zucchini bread dancing in my head.

And then I have the lemon basil. I cut some of this fresh on Friday evening. I used it to season the fresh trout that the STP and the Goob brought home from the lake. One of those three ingredient recipes I am so fond of. Trout, Lemon basil, and butter. It could only have been fresher if I had churned the butter after I came home from work.

But it is summer and I don't want to get in the habit of cooking.