Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Thanks Again

55. Skype
56. Unlimited minutes and time to use them
57. Abi--who knows what is really important
58. Baby Nick--safe and warm in the police car
59. Vacumm cleaners
60. Husbands who are not freaked out by tiny dead rodents
61. A clean house
62. A warm house
63. Flannel sheets
64. Sisters who call me just when I'm thinking about calling them
65. Bank holidays
66. Bird feeders filled with bird feed
67. Hope
68. Daffodil bulbs and 60 degree weather in November
69. Gluten free enchilada sauce
70. Clothes dryers--and Stasi to remind me to be thankful for mine
71. Prairie Mama for teaching me I don't have to stop at ten

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Twelve More

43. Fresh fruit
44. Balancing at the end of my day at the bank
45. Text messages
46. Doilies
47. Friendly post office clerks
48. Almonds
49. Sharp pencils
50. Tumbleweeds
51. Magnets
52. Respectful 13 year olds
53. Eating out
54. Chicken noodle soup

Monday, November 09, 2009

End of the Hunt

I would love to be able to give you a tutorial on Wyoming hunting, but I did not immerse myself in the sport with the same fervor as I did with fishing. So I can only tell you what I've picked up in bits and pieces as a rather disinterested bystander. Don't rely on this information.
Like fishing, you have to be here a year to get a resident license. So this was the STP's first chance to hunt as a resident.
Licenses are awarded in some complex lottery system involving at least 18 forms, except for general licenses which you can buy at the grocery store. Even then, they are only good for various animals at various times and in various locations. The locations are assigned numbers. There is a corresponding map for each license. If you are good at this you do not need the map because you have the numbers memorized. You say things like, "Did you draw 41?"
FYI The STP got his deer in 124.
There are blue lines on the map, but not on the ground. So I think non-residents must hunt with a resident guide who knows where the lines are. If you ask them how they know, I'm pretty sure they say, "There's a map for that."
Also like fishing, but to a much greater degree, you need an outfit. Said outfit includes layers: wicking underlayers, warm wooly midlayers, and waterproof outerlayers. You need these layers for your feet, your legs, your body, your hands, and your head. All of this should be camouflaged-even the underwear for some reason I don't understand at all. The camo is brown--so you blend in with the dirt. You will need a gun, shells, and a knife, binoculars and handwarmers. You should make these purchases on several trips to various outfitters so it is harder for your spouse to keep track of how much you have spent all together. Think of it as camouflage for the checkbook. You will need to pour over the Cabela's catalog all season for other things you need. Rangefinders, GPS, walking sticks, etc.
Please note: the November morning the STP shot his deer it was 55 degrees and he was wearing jeans, a sweatshirt he already owned, and his Pirates ballcap. But trust me--it's not usually like this.
Two things are very important about your hunting stories. First is the size of the rack. There is a complex way to measure and count and calculate and rate the antlers. In PA I think you just count the points. Here you give a series of numbers. Don't worry too much about this. Cabela's has a little rotary calculator to help with this. Put it on your wishlist (or just order it online).
For instance, the STP had what looked to me to be a beautiful 10 point. In WY reality it is a 5 by 5, category B (?) 24 inch something or other.
The second thing that is very important is how far the shot was. You measure this in yards. In is unsportmanlike to shoot a deer that is too close. I think this has something to do with the lack of trees. The idea is evidently to disguise yourself as dirt and sneak up on a deer and get close enough to get a shot. 200 to 300 yards seems like a good number to throw out there if, like me, you have a depth perception problem and don't yet own a rangefinder.
After a successful hunt and an exhausting haul out, you can load your trophy on the back of the truck and drive it through town. Stop by at least one friend's house to show it off. (If your wife is working at the bank, it is acceptable in Dodge City to drive it through the drive-up window.) Also, stop to get gas in the truck so complete strangers at the gas station can admire your trophy.
My favorite part of the successful hunt is that now the STP can get his hair cut. (And I have real antlers for my antler art projects.)

A Little Retreat

I took call at the hospital this weekend and because it is just a little too far from home, I had to sleep over. At the hospital. I had room 101. Fortunately, the hospital was not at capacity so it was a private room. I had just a few hours of work and a lot of time to think. And read. And pray. And watch the Giants lose. And knit. And nap. And talk on the phone. And be thankful. Here are a few things I was thankful for:
32. That I wasn't in the hospital because I was sick.
33. That I was testing other people's kids for influenza and not my own.
34. That I could see the mountains out my window.
35. Orange yarn and circular knitting needles
36. Peace
37. Quiet
38. A family that can care for themselves and each other for a weekend
39. A family that was glad to see me when I got home
40. Hugs
41. Kisses
42. Toothpaste

Thursday, November 05, 2009

I Hate To Be The One To Break The News...

...But I can't lie to you. In fact, Abi, you never had a childhood. Your 'real mother' dropped you off at our house and I just created memories by talking about things we could have done and staging a few photographs. Also, you loved coleslaw as a child and I'm sure I never let you have any. And those memories you have of 'playing' in the snow? I just put you outside because I couldn't stand your whining any more. And your real mother let you buy candy in the checkout aisle. And there's no such thing as the tooth fairy. I wrote those letters about the importance of brushing your teeth, and all those rotten little teeth I have saved in my jewelry box probably aren't yours. Or your 'sisters''.
But don't tell them any of this. It'll be our little secret. (They'll figure it out when they have their own kids.)

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

Keeping Up With Amanda

21. Hot chocolate
22. Milk chocolate
22. Afghans
23. Flannel nightgowns
24. Someone to snuggle with
25. Nieces who blog
26. Pecans
27. Apples
28. Caramel
29. Husbands who cook supper
30. Chicken in a bag
And taking the lead...
31. Apples and pecans covered in caramel and chocolate

Tuesday, November 03, 2009

Off To A Good Start

11. Sunrise
12. Full moon
12a. Sunrise and a full moon at the same time
13. Pink and purple clouds
14. Bird feeders
15. Sunflower seeds
16. Plastic pink flamingos
17. Yard sales
18. Online shopping
19. The Package Man
20. The post office and home mail delivery

Monday, November 02, 2009

Thankfully

Things I am thankful for--2009 edition:
1. My youngest daughter ,who reminded me of my thankful list.
2. My middle daughter, who did not remind me that I never got to 100 last year.
3. My oldest daughter, who may or may not know that it is November.
4. My son. Thankfully, there is only one.
5. My husband, who loves me. Period.
6. My granddaughter, who knows how to 'leave a message'.
7. My grandson, who couldn't be any cuter.
8. My sons-in-law, who love my daughters.
9. My jobs, which will pay for #10.
10. My plane tickets home for Christmas.

Speaking of Minimal Effort


The Goob wore his bedsheet ghost costume again this year. The big difference from last year is that he is so much taller that the ghost appeared to be floating rather that dragging along the ground. (And he tripped over his costume less.) On his way to a party, he made a few stops where people had their porch lights on. His theory is that people with their porch lights on WANT kids in costume to come to the door so they can give them candy. (I'm not sure they want to give candy to six foot tall bedsheet ghosts carrying pillowcases.) Here he is with the best part of his 'haul'. What a Goober.

Power Pumpkin Carving

I bought my pumpkin along time ago. It sat on the back porch because I bought it too early to even let any one see I had a pumpkin. I mean the kids were hardly back to school. But suddenly it was Halloween night and the pumpkin wasn't carved. It was already dark. And there was no way to get a candle inside the pumpkin. And no plan. So we just had to wing it. With a prayer and a power tool.






First we cut off the top (like Stasi suggested).

Then we searched for the pumpkin carving tools. Which were probably never on the truck.

So we decided to use the drill. And no pattern at all.

And then, just because pumkin carving is a good excuse to stab things with a knife, we used a knife too.

And then we put the candle inside and put it out on the porch. The front porch. Where it was less than impressive. But really, it is more about the process, isn't it? Isn't it?
I wish I had a really cool picture of it in the dark, but that would have required me to go outside and work with the camera, and, obviously, this was a minimal effort Halloween year.
You should just go to Ami's blog and see her pumpkin.
(I taught her everything she knows about pumpkin carving.)