Official Kickball Rules

Alex is searching for the official kickball rules. Seems there is some discussion on the playground about what the rules are. Some people want to vote on the rules, but Alex's concern is that more than half of the people with a vote are the cheaters. Alex discovers the problem with democracy in fifth grade. He downloaded offical rules from a few kickball leagues at both the college level and adult competitive leagues. One set of rules for a community fun league was 21 pages long. Evidently, more than half of adult kickball players are cheaters too.

This Makes Thirty

1. Toothpaste
2. Teeth
3. Periodontists
4. Smiles
5. Sisters
6. Aunts
7. Chicken broth
8. Homemade noodles
9. Gluten free noodles that don't dissolve in chicken broth
10. My Mom

Oodles of Noodles

From generation to generation...

Some things you should learn as a child. Things like eating raw noodle dough will stick your guts together. (Or give you worms, depending on which Aunt you listen to!) And that your aunts are really your mom's sisters and they were once kids together. And that making things is really more about the process than the end product.

Some things don't change.

Traditions handed down from generation to generation. Things that we do because our parents did them and our grandparents did them. Like piles of flour and eggs mixed and stretched and dried and cut and dried some more--until they are noodles spread all over the house on faded flowered tableclothes. And that you share things with your cousins that you don't share with just everyone. Like your bed. And your sense of humor.

And each generation adds its mark, uniquely its own. Like a noodle hat.

Ten More Things

1. apple dumplings
2. husbands who clean
3. sisters who understand clutter
4. nieces
5. nephews
6. Hershey kisses
7. clean sheets
8. automatic washing machines
9. swiffers
10. kids who still need resters

November-Virtue of the Month

Gratitude: Letting others know you see how they've helped you.

Is gratitude really an attitude or is it an action? Can I be thankful for something, or do I have to be thankful to someone. Can I just feel grateful or is it only gratitude when it is expressed?

Ten things I am grateful for:
1. My husband
2. My children
3. Noodle makers
4. My dog
5. Towels that wrap all the way around me
6. Hot chocolate
7. Mango salsa
8. Warm water from the tap
9. Indoor plumbing in general
10. Instant messaging

Friday Night Sights

Alex at Tae Kwon Do
Rain pouring down outside
Pumpkin cookies from Eat 'n Park
Dave making rice and beans for supper
Stray rice in a rootbeer float
A family of three and a dog watching Grease
Tigers losing the World Series
Orangutans and salt water crocodiles
arranged to make a Jack o'Lantern

Things crossed off my list

Finding a dermatologist
Taking a day off

Things I still need:
A dishwasher

I'm a 'V' or A Very Small Group

Tonight is the night that our small group usually meets. Frank and Tim and Steve had to work late. Laurie and Rhonda don't feel well. So we called Chuck and told him not to come. Dave is cranky and rather noncommunicative. If we were a Shel Silverstein poem we would be like this:
Laurie, our 'L', was home with the flu,
Frank, our 'O', had homework to do.
Chuck, our 'E', stayed home to play,
So I'm all of LOVE that could make it today.

Nevertheless,
'V' is very, very extraordinary...

All By Myself

I am feeling very alone here. I am never alone here. I want some time for myself. I am tired of being by myself. How can this be? Obviously it is because all of my sentences start with 'I'. Today I will mow the grass, wash two loads of clothes, go to the store, be home while Alex's friends come over. The sun is shining and I will smile and take the dog for a walk. I am going to plan a trip to NYC. Maybe I will even go there. But not today. And not by myself.

Holy Haircuts

Amanda and Brenda got haircuts together this afternoon. Here are the results. We are happy even though we currently have a lot of product in our hair. Our next big adventure for the day is to eat Chinese takeout. And then we will shop at Kohl's and save 20% on all of our purchases. Then Amanda will have to go back to college. All in all a great day.

Don't Tell Me Any Secrets

I used to have two secrets. Then someone talked to me about one of the secrets, so I assumed it was no longer a secret, so I talked about it to someone else who didn't know anything about it and if it wasn't a secret anymore then I think they would have known about it, so I think I told the secret. So now I just have one secret and a little guilt. I was doing very well, but obviously I am not as good as I thought I was. Sadly, it only takes one mess up to ruin a whole months worth of secret keeping. Some things don't come with do-overs. This makes me sad.
Now I only have one secret and it is not as much fun as it used to be to have it.
Don't ask me about it.

Little Red Flags

When he can't stand the idea of having two days without access to you every minute.

When he shows total disregard for your parents' values, rules and decisions--more than once.

New Phones

Abi's cell phone is in a box. Inside another box. Speeding along through the U.S. postal service. I insured it so that if along the way a disgruntled postal employee smashes it with a hammer, it will be replaced. The sad news is that Abi's service has already been switched to her new phone which will spend two days in a box. Last month Abi talked over 4000 minutes on her cell phone. This weekend she will suffer cell phone withdrawal. Maybe she can use the extra time to study. Night and weekend study minutes are free.
I have two cell phones. My $14.99 plan can't be cancelled until the end of the billing cycle which is the middle of October. (Alex wonders if there really is an end to a cycle?) I also am the proud owner of a brand new $69.99 family plan which will allow me to talk to Abi, Ami, Dave and millions of other Sprint PCS users all I want to. Last month I wanted to talk on my cell phone for 22 minutes. My new cell phone flips and takes pictures. Last month I did not have to open my phone to talk for 22 minutes and I didn't take any pictures with my phone.
The good news is with my new plan nights start at 7:00pm. I've been wanting more hours in the night, so this is a really good deal for me. I would also like summer to start in April. What does that plan cost?

Great Train Robbery

A surprise attack took place this weekend against an elderly woman and her innocent nephew traveling alone through the narrows--the scene of many infamous train robberies in days gone by. As the woman was reminiscing about her youth, one armed bandit emerged from the woods. The victims attempted an escape, the suspect gave chase, and a violent crash occurred. The suspect and an unknown accomplice in the ambush attack were last seen plunging into the river from a railroad bridge along the Clearfield line wearing nothing but their underwear. The condition of the victims and their underwear was not being released. One witness remarked that the suspect looked remarkably like the infamous duct-tape bandit active in a string of home burglaries in New York State. Anyone with imformation on this case should contact local authorities.

Shake Your Booties

Okay, remember this is not a knitting blog, but the booties are finished and the baby has arrived. My next booties will be pink and purple, so I hope the next baby is a girl. (and doesn't arrive for several months because I am a very slow knitter)

Also, this is not the Uncle Michael blog, but one more thing about him:
He is going to have a new baby in April.

I hope that wasn't a secret. I know two secrets and I am not telling them.

Ouch!

On Monday I had more periodontal work done. Oddly enough, I like my periodontist. He showed me his new phone, which does all sorts of tricks-take pictures, movies, internet, e-mail, PDA, MP3, etc. I think he showed it to me because I actually paid for it. On Tuesday, I felt pretty good. It is amazing to me that you can get used to the idea of someone surgically removing the roof of your mouth and suturing it in at your gumline. Today (Wednesday) I felt like someone ripped out the roof of my mouth and sewed it into my bottom lip. Ouch!

I tried to comment on Amanda's xanga, but I was not successful. First, I didn't include my birthdate. Then I didn't have the right combination or number of letters in my password. Then I tried three different names, but they were all taken. By then I forgot whatever comment I wanted to make so I gave up. So I do not have a xanga account, so I can not comment on Amanda's blog, but it seems to me she writes about crying alot. As her mother, this concerns me.

Uncle Michael's Red Bicycle

If you say it just right it rhymes.

So two of my red headed consanguins, who also happen to be my nephews, are on their way to Pittsburgh International Airport with Uncle Michael's red bicycle. (I didn't put any air in the tires so I don't think they will get very far.)

In other news....
Alex had a tooth extracted this afternoon. He has not had any dental work done since he was in first grade and then they put him out to do it. So he had no frame of reference for novacaine. He was somewhat upset about getting a shot, but he was really unnerved when the oral surgeon tried to inject it in his mouth. (He thought he would get it in the arm.) "Have you ever had a shot in your mouth?" he wanted to know. Once he understood he held very still and the tooth was out in less than a minute. It was an extra tooth to begin with, but it seems a shame to pull a perfectly good tooth.

Note to Uncle Michael: It was not a bluetooth.

Uncle Michael Weighs In

Tip:n. getting two clock radios from one of your paper customers.

Complaint: n. getting a clock radio from two different paper customers.

Thanks to Uncle Michael for today's Words of the Day.

Some things about Uncle Michael:
His name is not Mike.
Stasi mistakenly told her Slovak teacher that he works in a factory that makes bottles and cans.
He reads peoples blogs but has not been known to (officially) comment on them.
I have his red bicycle in my garage.
His daughter has red hair.

Okay--so that makes me wonder--Why isn't there a word for nieces and nephews collectively.
i.e. sons + daughters=children

Would nieces + nephews be niecews or maybe nepheces as in Three of my nepheces have red hair.

Really I'm thinking that this calls for a new word altogether. Something akin to nauffy.
Any suggestions?

This may be turning into a dictionary blog. I'm not a sure a knitting blog might not have been a good idea.

Tip of the Week

Things we have gotten as tips on the paper route:

Homegrown tomatoes
2 clock radios

Okay--so the 'two clock radios' was the best tip of the week.
Alex desires to spend the paper profits on a new gaming system
Mom desires to spend the paper profits on a new sewing machine.
"What's in it for me", Alex wants to know.
"I will make you clothes," says Miss Brenda.
"Maybe we could go on a cruise!"
"Yeah!"

We will need better tips than the clock radios before we see the Carribbean.

Virtue of the Month

Orderliness-arranging things to make your day easier
Be very careful, then, how you live--not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity. Ephesians 5:15-16
This evening I will make the most of the opportunity to clear off the dining room table. I am not going to bed until it is done. (It may well be a late night.) I have many things to do this week to prepare for the beginning of new minstries for AW Bible study and for the launch of WildLife for the 5th and 6th graders. I will miss Cubbies this year, but it is exciting to see new things begin. I know that Cubbies will be fine without me.

10 other things (not necessarily in order):
I miss my girls.
I love having a dog.
I had a good hair day.
I wore my shrug today.
I did not wake up with a praise song in my head.
I brought watermelon home from community appreciation day.
I am reading a book with Alex.
I am going to read another Hemingway book.
My booties are almost done.
I know a big secret.