HGTV Overload

I was on call on Black Friday.  So I had to do my shopping within 15 minutes of the health care facility.  Which still left me hours to knit and watch the holiday marathon on HGTV.  And I gleaned more decorating ideas and more inspiration than one woman should be allowed to glean. 
Here's some of what I learned:
1.  Don't forget to decorate the front door or dining room table.  (They did not give me any hints on what to do with the stack of papers I already have on the table.)
2.  Mix high and low.
3.  You can hire a decorator if you are a TV celebrity, a country music star, or married to a NFL player.
4.  I can not afford a decorator.
5.  How to cut dovetails on ribbons.  (This is so simple I can't believe I didn't already know this.  Maybe I knew it once and forgot it.)
6.  Disney World Christmas decorators work year-round and have a ribbon ROOM
7.  I definately want to visit Disney World at Christmas time.
8.  Teal and copper are the new red and green.
9.  Pheasant feathers are a legitimate Christmas decoration.
10.You can spray paint your Christmas tree.

On Saturday, I stayed home and decorated.  I tried to remember and apply what I learned.  I used a lot of things I already owned and some things I had bought at yardsales.  I decorated the obelisk with 45 cents worth of lights from a yardsale.  And I used two spools of wedding ribbon to string a dollar's worth of garage sale ornaments from the chandelier.  And I put the other 50 cents worth of ornaments in the big blue pot on the front porch.  And I finally took down the porch swing and the bats and hung the snowflakes.  I put the garland on the fence.  Late in the afternoon I had to send the STP to the store for one thing that I didn't have but needed.  Desperately needed.  Like absolutely couldn't celebrate Christmas without it.                       A can of silver spray paint.

Stand back because I haven't even started on the tree or the big room yet.

Bring the Tupperware

Our old friend Josh taught us the best thing to bring to Thanksgiving dinner--our Tupperware. 
This year we hosted a small Thanksgiving affair.  It was a rather last minute event.  I bought the smallest turkey I could find on the last day possible to thaw it in time for today.  When I bought the turkey no one was coming for Thanksgiving dinner.  (That will be 4 pounds of turkey for each of us and the Goob's mouth is so sore from having his braces adjusted that he can't chew anything.)  Today there were 7 us.  It was the best turkey I ever roasted.  I really wanted to take a picture of it, but I was already gloating, so in the interest of not being overly prideful, I refrained.  But trust me, it was awesome.  And after I sent a little home with the guests, I still have leftovers safely stored in my own tupperware. 
So this evening I am thankful for:
91.  Changed plans
92.  Moist, tender, delicious, melt in your mouth turkey
93.  Gluten-free gravy over mashed potatoes
94.  Cheesecake with caramel and chocolate
95.  Leftovers
96.  Friends who are willing to take a risk on my cooking
97.  Friends who bring their own tupperware
98.  Macy's
99.  Football to nap to
100.  My dog
101.  My God

So it wasn't quite Perkin's, but as Thankgivings go, it was a good one. 

Just as an observation: when you choose your Thanksgiving guests there is less drama than having a big family Thanksgiving with your big family. Not as much pressure to make a perfect pie or decide who will bring the rolls.  Not as much analyzing of what 'she' might have meant by that comment, or jockeying for position, or bickering over left overs from years past.  Not as much chance that someone will get mad and leave early.  No need to use paper plates for fear someone will throw things.  I miss our big family.  I almost miss Perkin's.

Lines of Communication

Me (incredulous):  Goob, did you get your haircut?
Goob (equally incredulous): NO
Me:  Oh, maybe you just got taller.
Goob:  Yeah, I must be outgrowing my hair.

Approaching Thanksgiving

82.  Turkey bucks  (which is closely related to coupons, not turduckens)
83.  Mrs. Speece's cranberry jello salad recipe
84.  Homemade applesauce
85.  Foley mills
86.  Sweet potato casserole
87.  Pecans
88.  Chocolate chips on sale
89.  Ron's Food Farm--close to home
90.  Positive numbers 

Hunting story #5--A Blast from the Past or Delilah I Ain't

There are still new things I am discovering about the STP after 30 years of marriage.  This hunting season I heard two stories from his childhood that I had never heard before. Most of his stories I have heard over and over again.  But evidently these two are reserved for sharing with hunting buddies while walking up and down hills rather than the woman you have been sleeping with for 30 years. 
One story involved a bank his Great Grandmother had put coins into while his mom was pregnant with him.  He still has a few of those coins.  He told me he had never told me this one before because he didn't want me to marry him or stay with him for his money. Yeah, good thing I didn't know about that Indian head nickel.  (Anyway, he should know by now that it's his good looks that keep me around.)
The other story involved rabbit hunting when his father shot the dog for not hunting up to expectations.  I accused the STP of making this story up.  Maybe he had his childhood confused with a movie he saw once.  Was the dog's name 'Yellar'?  But he says you don't ever forget something like that.  I'm not sure you ever get over it either.  If he had told me this before we were married, I might not have married him.  I certainly would have thought twice before birthing any babies with him. 

So today I am thankful for
81. my dad, who has been married to my mom for over 50 of his 70 something years and who never shot the dog. 
(Although, now that I think about it, I'm not sure what ever happened to either Happy or Jeanie.)

Just Askin'

Would eating a McFlurry in a snowstorm when it is 12 degrees Fahrenheit be the polar opposite of barbecuing in a sauna?

If you haven't been menstrual in over a year, can you still be pre-menstrual?

Why do people who can't control their bladder for two hours in a movie theater all sit in the same row?  (And why is it my row?)  ((And would it be rude to ask everyone in my row to please 'just try' before the movie starts?))

In My Seventies

71.  Payday
72.  Laughter
73.  Teeth
74.  Voice boxes
75.  Trombones
76.  Bacon and eggs
77.  Chicken in a bag
78.  Photographs
79.  Memories (I think that was already on my list from this year, but it followed photographs so well that I am going to leave it here.  When I am really in my seventies, my memory will not be as sharp as it is now (?)and I will list the same 10 things over and over again throughout the month of November.  Or I may give thanks in October.  Are you looking forward to my seventies as much as I am?)
80.  Songs in my head

Sing a New Song

You could be reading The Wild Goose Chase along with me.  Or you could do like the STP does when I read a book and just wait for me to share the gems with you.

Today's gem:  Sacred routines become empty rituals when we do them out of left brained memory instead of right brained imagination...One of the greatest dangers we face spiritually is learning how and forgetting why. 

So today I will try to be more aware of changing my place and my pace.  More aware of my surroundings. 
Of course, by taking the time to share this with you, I am now running late (as usual).
Look for me today.  I'll be the bank teller humming a new song.  (It will of course still be off key and mostly unrecognizable :) )

Rotten Banana Tuesday

61.  FREE rotten bananas
62.  Country church cookbooks with tried and true recipes
63.  Gluten-free flour and rolled oats
64.  People who appreciate a home-made gluten-free banana nut muffin fresh from the oven
65.  A Tuesday morning with time to bake

(a little break here because the next entries are not really related to rotten bananas)

66.  Anastasia Grace--a gift from God 28(!) years ago today
67.  Hot tamale nail polish and nine toenails to paint it on
68.  A balanced checkbook
69.  Negative numbers
70.  Apples

Sunday Thankful

I am studying Mark Batterson's book Wild Goose Chase with my small group.  Love his use of adverbs.  So tonight I am thankful that God is:
46.  Unconditionally loving
47.  Omnipotently powerful
48.  Eternally faithful

And I am thankful for these things which I usually take for granted:
49.  That the earth continued to orbit the sun today
50.  That as the earth rotated on its axis at about 1000 miles/hour, gravity was greater than centrifugal force, and I did not fly off.
51.  Bacteria in my colon
52.  Breathing

And I am thankful for these things unique to my day:
53.  Lunch invitations
54.  Gluten-free enchilada lasagna
55.  Gluten-free brownies
56.  Friends who think enough of us to extend and share 53, 54, and 55.
57.  Small group
58.  Snowflakes
59.  Tires that are not flat
60.  Sabbath rest

Hunting Story #4

The Saga Continues...
Going to Billings today to buy more accurate ammunition. 
'Nough said.

Talking Turkey Thanks

I was thinking about grilling our turkey this Thanksgiving, but then I heard this quote on Parenthood (you know, my favorite TV show):
Grilling dad to son:  How do you like your hot dogs?  Burnt?  Very Burnt?  Or completely black?
The STP has come a long way since the girls thought that all hot dogs should be peeled before eaten, but I'm not sure he is ready to tackle a turkey.
Nonetheless:
41.  The Weber grill
42.  Grill gloves
43.  Turkey bucks
44.  Charcoal
45.  Charcoal starter

10 Things I'm Thankful I Know

31.  How to read
32.  How to knit
33.  How to pronounce ragout
34.  That Jesus loves me
35.  Where my car keys, my cell phone,and my camera are right now
36.  That homemade chocolate chip cookies and fresh salsa are worth the effort
37.  That homemade potato chips are not worth the effort
38.  What Panko breadcrumbs are
39.  What, in the grand scheme of things, is really irreplacable
40.  That the things that shape me do not have to define me

Oh My (Bountiful) Goodness

I was away this weekend when the bountiful basket arrived, so the STP picked it up, sent me a picture of all my wonderful produce on the counter, and then put it away in the refrigerator.  So it was like Christmas-getting wonderful surprise things; and like Easter, where you have to look for your basket like it's some kind of treasure hunt.  So far in my fridge I've found eggplant, and mushrooms, and collard greens (otherwise known in our house as compost greens), and green beans, and cauliflower, and zucchini (are you out of your mind?), and these:

Any guesses?

The STP reported they were persimmons.  So we googled some recipes.  Evidently people native to the state of Indiana use the pulp of persimmons to make puddings and cakes around Thanksgiving time.  One site suggested you could squeeze them through a laundry bag to extract the pulp.  There were just enough pictures to convince the STP and I that we may not need any persimmon pudding this Thanksgiving, thank you very much.  But just as I was about to scald my little persimmons anyway, I noticed this:

Maybe these were not in fact persimmons.  Maybe they were FUYUs.  So I went back to Google.  And I discovered that there are two types of persimmons.  The kind you boil and squeeze through a laundry bag to remove the annoying seeds and mix along with 13 other ingredients into a pudding which you steam in the oven for two hours while you stir it every 15 minutes and serve it with brandy flavored whipped cream,  AND FUYU persimmons which are seedless and which you peel and slice like an apple and serve with little tooth picks.  (I am not even making any of this up.)  And my bountiful basket came with the FUYU kind of persimmons. How good is that?  I prepared one just like the recipe:

And then I adapted the recipe for less formal occasions by eliminating both the little toothpicks and the little plate.

And for serving to real men during Monday Night Football might I suggest just eating it right off the knife.

This concludes this segment of Ms Brenda Cooks FUYU.

Thanks Be

23.  Stouffers' Vegetable Lasagna--Heavy on the pasta and cream sauce--light on the vegetables.  All the glory--none of the fuss.  Really--this stuff is good.
24.  Scrubs with drawstring pants. You know how I feel about drawstring pants.  They are especially good after a family size portion of Vegetable Lasagna.  They should be the official garb for Thanksgiving Day ( and the day after Thanksgiving).
25.  Floss.  And the feeling of clean teeth after using said floss.
26.  Home made cinnamon rolls.  I haven't had these in a long time, but just the memory makes me happy. 
27.  Memories.  All sorts.
28.  Scissors.  It would be so much harder to cut things without them.
29.  Warm weather in November.
30. The anticipation of the first snow of the season.

Confession is Good For the Soul or How Big Is That If?

Today was another beautiful fall day in Dodge City.  A perfect day in fact to trawl troll skulk drive through town with my alternate hands.  Actually I do not have a bucket and shovel for alternate hands.  But I do have a bucket and shovel that fit in the back seat of my car.  So this afternoon I loaded up my bucket and shovel and drove (using my regular hands) to the north end of town to dig out my peonies.  What were my peonies doing on the north end of town? you might ask.  Well, they were thriving there.  Outside the old parsonage.  Where the former pastor's wife left them.  Years ago.  She had plenty of chances to come and get them.  And as the current pastor's wife, if I were to live in the parsonage, they would now be my peonies.  In fact they are now my peonies, because as I already told you, today I dug them out and moved them to the south side of town.  Into my newest flower bed.  Where they will be loved and appreciated.  Don't think of it as stealing.  Think of it as relocating.  To a better place.
(If I had an accomplice, I would have vidoetaped the whole thing and posted it on You-tube and linked to it from my facebook page so.  If you just moved next door, I wouldn't have to go to such lengths.  Or we could go together...)

Twenty-two

22.  Chocolate chip cookies with nuts, a grandma who always had homemade ones, a mom who taught me to bake them in her kitchen, and a daughter who makes the best ones. 

Seriously Thankful

16.  The STP--Who loves me enough to hide the leftover Halloween chocolate
17.  The Goob--Who loves me enough to watch The Biggest Loser with me
18.  The Slovakian Princess--Who loves me enough to include me on her thankful list without prompting
19.  The Queen of Queens--Who loves me enough to bring my grandchildren to Wyoming to visit me
20.  Princess Amidala--Who loves me enough to publish a second thankful list to make me happy
21.  Jesus--Who loves me enough to die for me

Won't You Be My Neighbor?

Now is your chance.  Remember how you would like to live closer to me.  So we can have tea together and laugh together and talk over the fence and share a clothesline?
Well the house next door is for sale and you could buy it and live next door to me.  Come one.  You know you want to.
I already know where we will put the gate in the fence. 

In All Circumstances

Five things that I do have today that I am struggling to be thankful for:

11. Alarm clocks
12. House guests
13. Pony tail holders
14. Pomengranate seeds
15. Laundry

I Thessalonians 5:16 Rejoice always, 17 pray continually, 18 give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

A Comment on My Alzheimers

After I posted this morning I remembered that I was thankful that I do not have early onset Alzheimers.  So I added it as a comment--thinking how clever it was that I forgot I didn't have Alzheimers.
When I checked the blogs after work today I was so excited to see that someone had commented on my thankful list.  But when I checked the comments it turns out it was me commenting how thankful I was that I didn't have Alzheimers.  So I will not count not having Alzheimers as  #11 on my thankful list. 
(The STP has promised not to tell me when I really have Alzheimers.  I'm pretty sure I will be blissfully ignorant.)

Starting With The Little Stuff

Time again for Ms Brenda'a mostly annual November giving of thanks.  This year instead of starting with the obvious, I am going to start with the mostly overlooked things I am thankful for.  (Remember that I am thankful to God.) 

Today I am especially thankful for things I do not have:
1.   leprosy
2.   ingrown toe nails
3.   blindness
4.   bedbugs
5.   more than $10,000 of credit card debt
6.   divorce papers
7.   a drug addiction
8.   the ability to read minds
9.   blue hair
10. a sinkful of dirty dishes

Oh, AWANA Be Like Jesus

You might be from Wyoming if your AWANA club theme is 'hunter's orange' and your game pin is sporting antlers.