Signs, Signs, Everywhere There're Signs

From the Archives

It was 103 degrees when we moved in here. (Of course, it is a dry heat...I'm not sure what that means except that you broil to death rather that boil.) On Saturday I needed to do laundry and couldn't find the bottle of detergent that I packed, so I ran to Ron's Food Farm just like I was. No worries I told myself--no one here knows me. But as I was dragging my grubby body out through the parking lot with a bag of Hershey's kisses and a bottle of all temperature detergent I remembered that my picture had been on the front page of the weekly paper on Thursday. There was also a very nice article about Dave being the new pastor in town on page two. (I'm guessing it may have been page one news if it wasn't the week of the county fair. We just can't compete with pig wrestling.) So much for anonymity.
Talked to the guy who lives across the street. He and his wife loaned us an air conditioner. When I talked to him on the phone he says, 'I noticed you haven't got a pick-up.' Evidently, not much I do goes unnoticed here.
Tonight I am waiting till after dark to go out and take an old window frame out of the dumpster. No doubt someone will ask me about it at church on Sunday.

Things That Rock

I found two little chairs that swivel and rock for in the living room. I found them at a garage sale. They will look good with the fabric I am using to recover the dining room chairs. I found the fabric for $5.00 a yard at Wal Mart. Today I recovered one chair just to see if I could do it without my sister Sara to help me. It turned out okay, but it wasn't as much fun. But yeah for rocking chairs and cheap fabric. Also today I vacuumed the living room. So my chairs rock and my vacuum sucks. It's all good.

Things That Suck

Not everything we had made it on the truck.. I had no carpet in the house in Mars except in the basement, but I owned three vacuum cleaners. None of them made it on the truck. My house in Greybull has alot of carpet. So today we went to Billings (yes, as in Montana) and I bought a new vacuum cleaner. As we were waiting in line to check out, an older gentleman commented that that was a good vacuum. He had one like it and he really liked it. He also had a Dyson, and it really sucked. So I was glad I didn't buy a Dyson. At lunch, as we were talking about the vacuum and the conversation Dave explained that he was saying that the Bissell was almost as good as his Dyson. Very powerful. Of course. He meant sucked as a person over 50 would say it. And I heard it like my kids would say it. Guess I am just a young thinker.
We were eating at Denny's and while we were eating one of the waitresses was vacuuming under the table next to us. We decided her job really sucked.

Traveling

This is the truck we used to move. It had a picture of a giant slug-like creature on it. Kind of appropriate for the progress we made. On day one we made it about and hour from home when the alternator stopped working. We didn't even make it out of Pennsylvania. A five hour delay. You know those times you pass someone broken down along the road and you are thankful it isn't you? Well, it was us. On day two about an hour and a half into the day we blew a tire on the truck. I got very good at setting up the little orange caution triangles. The Illinois state police were even impressed. A three hour delay. By this point in the trip we had to refigure stopping points, and reschedule the house closing, and find a fax machine. The gentleman working on closing on the house in Mars needed one more signature. He suggested we find a Kinko's. Excuse me, but we are driving a 26 foot truck and towing a car on a trailer in th middle of nowhere. Hows about I just fax it from the hotel if I ever get there tonight? Still day two, we are making decent progress when a kind driver pulls up next to us and beeps his horn and gestures that there is something wrong at the back of our truck. Once more we are on the side of the road. Dave gets out to check. I stay in the cab because I don't even want to know. This time (no kidding) the bikes have fallen off the back of the car and we have been dragging them along the interstate behind the trailer. ( Alex had the presence of mind to take pictures of this. They are of course on Amanda's camera). Day three Dave forgets to reattach the cooler with the bungee cords. It does not(!) fall off and bounce along the road. Could our luck be changing? We finally make it to Wyoming. As we enter the state there is a large white robed statue along the road.

Dave: Is that Batman?

Alex: Um, Dad, I'm pretty sure it's Jesus.

It concerns me that the new pastor's first thought on seeing a large robed (he says 'caped') figure is that it might be Batman. Three days in a truck will do that to you.

My House

Living in a Bubble Wrap

A before and after...

I have been out of touch. No TV, no internet, no news.

I didn't even know there was an earthquake.

Abi told me that California fell into the ocean. I thought she was kidding. "Good news," she said. "You're closer to the beach."

Two weeks without the internet has made me realize that before I had a blog, I just blogged in my head. And that thoughts don't stay in my head very long. For instance, I left my camera's battery charger at my mother-in-law's on my way back from vacation. Even though Dave called her and asked her to send it, I am afraid she will not remember to send it or she will forget who to send it to. And someone else will get my battery charger and not know why, or even what it is. This was really annoying to me, until I remembered that I was the one who FORGOT it in the first place. It is scary to me when I think I am becoming my mother. The thought of becoming my mother-in-law--too scary for words.

Anyway, Amanda let me use her camera to document the move. But I can't get the pictures off of it, because I don't have the right cord. (How did this get so complicated?) So, if I can remember, I will try to catch you up. If not, that will be two weeks we just missed.

Remind me to find out about the re-engineered butter sticks...

Currently Unemployed

Farewell to Brenda

Our lives have been blessed with your faith and your humor,

And now that you're leaving (it's not just a rumor!)

Wait!! An E. coli, two Campys!! Your dreams here fulfilled!

We knew you could do it, we knew you were skilled!

We wish you the best that Greybull can offer...

Great friends in the church, and many days off, or...

Perhaps a new line of work you'll pursue...

Some cooking! Some blogging!

Who knows what you'll do?

But while your mind's ticking and your camera is clicking,

Please think of us once in a while.

For who do you know, among your good friends,

Who can handle bulk poop with such style?

We're sad that you're going, but excited as well,

About all the stories you soon shall tell!!

So jot down some thoughts, save a picture or two,

Enjoy shopping at WalMart (heard your choices ar few.)

And know that we send all our prayers, all our love...

You could only get more from our big God above.

I used to work with some really good people....

Sage Advice

When you spend a week with your family you learn some things. About your nieces and nephews, about your Aunts and Uncles, about your parents, and about yourself. This is a little advice to some first time kayakers from their Uncle Ron. Listen closely...

Porch Swinging

10 years ago I bought a porch swing. All by myself. It was advertised in the Penny Saver as an antique porch swing for $25. The guy I bought it from said it had been his Grandma's.
Dave was just slightly less distressed than the porch swing when he saw it. He became slightly more distressed when he found out I had actually paid money for it. I loved it from the beginning. Grudgingly he repaired it. Lovingly I scraped, sanded and painted it. It hung on two porches. It only crashed to the floor twice. It has been repaired and repainted several times. It was in it's prime. But it was time to move on. So we advertised it on Craigslist (the electronic version of the Penny Saver) as an antique porch swing for $25--Just like your Grandma's swing. Within twenty minutes we had two inquiries. The first ones came to look at it the next morning, but it was not exactly what they wanted. Good thing, because the person who bought it was meant to have it. Here are copies of her e-mails:

Please sell it to me! I can pick up asap!! Call me or send me address to google. I'm in love w that swing!!

10 minutes later:

Oh I so really want this swing. It would be going to a great home. Please make my day?
Sorry to bug ya

And after she knew she was second in line:

:(
Keep me posted?!

And after she picked it up (less than 18 hours after we posted it):

Just wanted 2 say thanks!! The swing is $25 of sheer delight! I am so glad it worked out. Thanks 2 ur kids too for their help. I really am so happy! Dont feel sad for ur swing will be loved the rest of its days!

Somehow I think this may have been her swing all along and I was just keeping it for her for 10 years. I was happy to do my part.

I have a new porch swing for my new porch in Wyoming. It doesn't need repaired, but I will have to paint it. (When Dave isn't looking!)

Unrenewed Contracts

I got my cellular bill today. $465.83 in 'valid charges'. I was on hold for almost an hour with a very accommodating customer service representative--who couldn't do anything for me unless I first renewed my contract. It wasn't like he didn't give me a choice. I could choose to renew for 12 months or 24 months. I chose none of the above.
I suggested that when my bill approached $300.00 in text message overages that they could have given me a heads up. You know--they could at least have sent me a text message.
The service rep wanted to know if I had any problem with dropped calls. I used 14 anytime minutes on my cell phone last month. They didn't have time to drop any of my calls. That works out to $33.72 per minute. No wonder they are so anxious for me to renew my contract.
I didn't send or receive any text messages on my phone. As inept as I am at texting, they would really like me to start doing more of it. They charged Amanda 20 cents per message for every one of the 1500 messages after the 300 I had already paid for. I'm sure they would want to charge me per minute, since that would be more profitable for them.
I suggested to Amanda that 1800 text messages per month=60/day. At a minute each that's one hour spent texting/day. She suggested that that's her 'cigarette breaks'. I suggested it would be cheaper to smoke.
At the end of the day Amanda has unlimited text messaging on her phone and her mother suggested she take up smoking.
I tried to think of something clever to type here, but I couldn't think of anything except CU L8ter. Clearly, I am not the texting type.

Can I Pet Your Dog?

Dixie went to the Fourth of July parade. She wore her red, white, and blue and was very well behaved. She was a magnet for little kids. It was a great day to have a dog. Who would have guessed we would ever be dog people.

Running Recklessly Through the English Language

Last evening Alex informed us that he planned to run recklessly through the neighborhood. As in not running into anything or causing any trouble. I believe that word would be 'wrecklessly'. Often we tell Amanda as she is leaving the house to 'drive recklessly and take risks'. It is because she found our advice to 'drive cautiously and be careful' a tad on the ridiculous side. As if she would do anything but. So when we tell her to 'drive recklessly' she knows we mean 'be careful because we love you tremendously'. Guess maybe we should explain that to Alex before he gets a driver's license.

reck·less
[rek-lis]
–adjective
1.utterly unconcerned about the consequences of some action; without caution; careless (usually fol. by of): to be reckless of danger.
—Related forms
reck·less·ly, adverb

Questions Alex has that I have no good answer for:
1. Why is monosyllabic such a long word?

June (Thunder)Showers Bring...

Hollyhocks (and bees)
in the side garden

A little thyme on the rock patio

Johnny jump ups(originally a gift of seeds from my husband))

Yarrow (from Sara's Clearfield estate)

Coreopsis moonbean (being crowded out by the coneflowers) My Mom and I took a road trip from South Fork to get this for my wall garden there.

Pray this works

Brenda is letting me try to learn how to download video - I "pray" it works! (Dave)

Flower Show, Part 3

I especially love the bee in the picture of the lamb's ear and the little yellow flowers on the yellow vine. I didn't even know this would bloom.

Thanks for 'touring the grounds' with me.

Sick As A Dog

Now I know where this phrase comes from. Sadly, I think I was the cause of Dixie's distress. I love when I get to eat something completely different. Evidently, dogs do not have the same reaction. Happily, she is feeling much better. She is sunning herself in the back yard right now. Surprisingly, her complete recovery looks alot like dead. Trust me she is better. (Thankfully, I will not be posting any pictures taken while she was sick.)

Make Me An Offer

Tonight the real estate agent called to say we had an offer on the house. He negotiated a great deal. Every thing is good about it--except the money. This confuses me a little. I have never sold a house before, but I thought it was mostly about the money.
If I knew where my husband was I would ask him what he thinks. Evidently there is no cell phone service in Wyoming. I googled 'large disasters in Wyoming' and didn't come up with anything recent. Guess the state is still there. Guess my husband is in it.
The dog has bowel issues.
House, husband, dog...all serious offers will be considered.

Little Boxes

So a realtor called and wanted to show the house and I picked up all the 'stuff' from the floor and put it back into the box in no particular order. Then I painted something. This isn't going as well as I'd hoped.

Everybody Loves Parfaits

Today (even though it is only 12 degrees here) we have found summer. Amanda and I happily ate it all up. Hope there's at least a couple of layers of happy in your day.

Sharing

I read an article yesterday about reducing costs by sharing your home. Amanda and I are working this to perfection this week. She leaves for work at 5:00pm and returns at 5:00am. I will leave tomorrow morning at 4:30 and return at 4:00pm. I am off today, so I hope she gets up in time to grill with me this afternoon.
I spent my evening sorting through papers in a box in the basement. The final result is that I took everything out of the box. Looked at it. Spread it out around me and tried to decide what to do with it. Left it there and went to bed. I have lived without knowing what was in the box for 10 years, but now that I know I still have it I am having a hard time deciding if I still need it.
Sadly, I have two more boxes and two filing cabinets still to do.
At least it is a quiet activity that I can do in the basement and it won't wake my roommate.

Burnt Out

Why doesn't the little light behind my CHECK ENGINE indicator ever burn out?

Housing Issues

Acts 7:48"Yet that doesn't mean that Most High God lives in a building made by carpenters and masons. The prophet Isaiah put it well when he wrote, "Heaven is my throne room; I rest my feet on earth. So what kind of house will you build me?" says God. "Where I can get away and relax? It's already built, and I built it."

I am just a little behind in my Daily Audio Bible. So let's just pretend that today is June 10th. The OT reading is from I Kings where Hiram is making things out of bronze for King Solomon. Like 27 foot pillars. And six foot basins. And there is one statement about the sum of it that says no one has any idea how much bronze was used. I like the concept of that. Just creating things for God's glory and not keeping track of how much it costs, or how long it takes, or how much you pour into it. No one has any idea...

Then the NT reading is from Acts 7. Kind of like God's commentary on the magnificience/significance of all that Solomon has built. Kind of like 'Nice try'. Twenty seven foot tall pillars with two rows of pomengranates? All made out of who-knows-how-much burnished bronze? Let Me put that here beside Heaven and see how it compares? Where can I get away and relax?

This made me think that God is looking for a beach house. And if His desire is to dwell in me, then wouldn't it be totally cool to be God's beach house. Where He goes to relax. I just love the idea of hanging out with the Most High God.

No one has any idea...

From My Son, Whom I Love Dearly

"Do something constructive," I told him as I left for my dentist appt. He constructed a pyramid of peanut butter graham crackers. And he left a kiss-up note. But here is the part that really sealed it.

He put the crackers and the peanut butter back on the pantry shelf.

That's why he's my favorite son.

Stolen Thoughts

What do I want to be when I grow up?

Big.

I think we focus too much energy on church growth. I think it's all about personal growth. It's not about growing a big church. It's about growing big people--people who serve sacrificially, give generously, dream ridiculously, and love gracefully.

Just wanted to jot this here so I would remember it. Stole it from Mark Batterson's blog. I think I would like to be a big person. (Plus those are four good adverbs.)

And They're Off

Stasi and Micah left this am for Slovakia via Pittsburgh, Washington DC, Munich, and Vienna. They will arrive tomorrow morning (or afternoon depending on your time zone). We were glad to see them go. In a proud parent, glad you are capable of flying, sort of way. Her dad cried just a little. In an I can't believe you are all grown up and leaving sort of way. Roots and wings.

The Horrible, No-good, Very Bad Day

I should have known when the principal called me. At work.
I should have known not to try to mow the grass.
Things I have run over with the lawn mower in my lifetime:
1. A snake
2. A big red rubber ball
3. My own big toe
4. A baby rabbit
And now 5. The fire bowl.
I managed to destroy not only the fire bowl, but the lawn mower as well. Fortunately I am married to a very understanding man. Who is able to to fix a lawn mower.
Buying the part is another story. (Here is another great idea that I do not have the energy to do myself so I am offering up to anyone who wants it. A hardware/home improvement store run and staffed by women. Who would not feel the need to ask silly questions.)
"What did you hit? A rock?"
"Do you need to know that to find the right part to fix it?"
I'm just saying.

It's Time for Sleepytime

No better place 'to rest your head' than on Pappy's shoulder.

Who Knows When...

...we'll be all together again?

Hoot and Holler

In the car on the way to church this evening:

"Can we hoot and holler?"

"I'm not sure that is appropriate."

"What is appropriate? Just hooting?"

There was just a little hooting, and a few tears. (And I was modestly clothed.) Yeah, I would do that again.

Two of my children missed my baptism, one of my children took pictures, and one didn't want to be there at all, but was. I'm not mentioning any names, but I asked him to dress nicely, but he wore his dirty pants, and played his game boy until the service started, and sulked in the pew, and left to use the bathroom in the middle of the service. It's alright, because I will return the favor. On his wedding day.

Garage Sale

We gathered together every thing we didn't want anymore and all the junk we have accumulated and put it all together in the garage and invited half the world to come and look at it. Fortunately, they didn't all show up. Unfortunately, the garage is still full of junk. But we made $100.00 and we met some very nice and some very interesting people. (And a few nice and interesting people.) When people find out you are moving to Wyoming, they are suddenly free to tell you all sorts of things that they wouldn't ordinarily share with complete strangers. And if you have an opinion on what we should do with the toboggan, feel free to share it. Everyone else did. What they didn't do was buy it.

Bonus Question

In case you're still struggling with the bonus question about where cotton balls used to remove nail polish should go, here's a hint:

Under the porch swing?

WRONG!

Amanda may be the first child left behind. Literally.

Baptism Details

I am going to be baptized. For the second time. Sunday evening. 6:00pm. Butler Community Alliance Church. You are welcome to come. It will not be the big event that I had thought it might be. I will share the service with about 20 other people also getting baptized. Maybe that is God's gentle reminder that's it's not really all about me. I am still sure that this is the right time and place for this. Here is my story I am going to share:

My parents, in the custom of their church, had me baptized as an infant, and took me to church faithfully as a child. When I was 17 and trying to decide what to do with the rest of my life I had a theology to base it on. I had memorized the answers to the big questions in second grade. Who made me? God made me. Why did God make me? God made me to know Him, love Him, serve Him in this world, and be happy with Him in heaven. So if I was to serve God, I must first get to know him. As I began to figure out how to get to know God, a friend literally read the four Spiritual Laws booklet with me.

1.God loves you and has a wonderful plan for your life.

2.Man is sinful and separated from God.

3.Jesus Christ is God's only provision for man's sin.

I knew all of this. But number 4 was something new to me. And it was just what I was looking for—a personal relationship with God.
4.We must individually receive Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord;then we can know and experience God's love and plan for our lives.
So that night in the fall of my freshman year in a dorm room at Penn State I prayed and asked Jesus to be the Lord of my life and began a relationship with Him.

Because I had already been baptized and because it wasn’t necessary for my salvation, I was never baptized as an adult. I grew up, became a pastor’s wife, and served the Lord as I continued to get to know Him.

This last year of my life I have stepped back from ministry and what I discovered is how much God loves me. Whether I serve Him or not. Somehow, I had gone from knowing Him to serving Him and missed the loving Him part. Today I have a deeper understanding of not only Who God is but that I can love because He first loved me. Enough to die for me.

So my desire in being baptized is to declare my love for the God Who made me, loved me, died and rose again for me, and sings over me.

The LORD your God is with you, He is mighty to save. He will take great delight in you. He will quiet you with His love. He will rejoice over you with singing.

Zephaniah 3:17

The good news is that since I didn't get to plan the service I will not be singing. But that's okay, because God will be.

All Together

For the last several years, every time we are all together I say, "Who knows when we will be all together again." Today we all finally felt it. Abi, Jimmy and Claire go back to New York tomorrow. Stasi and Micah leave for Slovakia next Thursday. God is preparing a place for the rest of us in Wyoming. But today here are my four most favorite women in the whole world. All together. In Ohio of all places.

Other Things I Planted This Week

How much of God's creation is unseen by most of us?

I am amazed by this little fungus. Green fuzzy with yellow centers on the top of the agar. The underside of this same fungus is red. (Do you wonder what would happen if the plates were incubated right side up instead of upside down?) The blue is a stain that allows the microscopic structure to be seen more clearly. This fungus has both macro and micro conidia. So many creative details. So unique. I am amazed that the One Who created the planets and stars, mountains and oceans designed something this small and intricate. Talk about fine motor skills.

Azalea, Clematis, Iris, Lilac

Grandpa, Is That You?

I was cleaning out my jewelry box. You might not think this is too hard because I only have two pieces of jewelry that I wear and one of those hasn't fit me for years. (Thus the need for a jewelry box--a place to keep my wedding ring.) Why then do I have a box full of things? Because some of them are just treasures. I found about a dozen baby teeth from various of my children. A couple of letters to the tooth fairy and one long list addressed to Santa. A few precious necklaces purchased with love at the Santa Shop or the Vacation Bible School store. (I wore one of these to Abi's wedding to pay them back for all their thoughtful gifts over the years.) I found photo buttons from several soccer and band seasons. (Dave is wearing these around the house now. I refuse to ask him why.) An old pair of eyeglasses. A hospital bracelet I must have worn while giving birth. A few other trinkets, bracelets, rings, and one badly tarnished necklace with 4 little hinged people with birthstones in their bellies.
And this vial of dirt. It is a small plastic tupperware-like container with a tightly fitting lid. It is about half full of a fine gray powder. I have no idea what it is or where it came from or why I have it. Amanda says, "Grandpa, is that you?" and we all collapse laughing. So if you know what (or who) this is and if I should keep it please let me know.
I have now put 4 empty vials in my underwear drawer, so that when my kids meet there after my death, they will have their containers for my ashes ready. Sadly, when I went to my underwear drawer there was no underwear in it today. If I didn't have so much laundry to do I would tell you why I was cleaning out my jewelry box.

Leap Frog

Of the origami variety...

Me and My Mom

My Mom does not speak Spanish, she is voice mail challenged, but she knows what to do with a head of cauliflower. Likewise, I don't speak Spanish, am cell phone challenged, and if I could find the recipe for cauliflower salad I'm pretty sure I could make it. Like mother, like daughter.

Sick To My Stomach

This morning my stomach is upset. I drove Alex to school with the uncomfortable feeling that I might throw up at any minute. If this is a bug I picked up somewhere we might all get it. I warned Alex that if he felt this way he should have the nurse call me if he felt sick. He wondered if he could just call if he wanted to come home with the excuse that someone in his family was ill. (This was a 'no'.) Then it hit him that the Grandmas were in danger. (Happy Mother's Day--I brought you a hanging plant and a stomach virus...) We decided there was no need to warn them since they were already infected if they were going to be. Alex and I have scarily similar thought processes. Hopefully today we are only sharing brainwaves and not a stomach virus as well.

Where The Deer and The Antelope Play

When we sent out our family picture I tried to crop out the elk head that was mounted on the wall behind our heads. I should have left it in the copy we sent to Greybull. In Big Horn County this kind of thing is worth big points. Several people commented on it, had questions about it, were dissappointed we hadn't mounted it ourselves. Incidentally, no one had any questions or comments about my children or my grandbaby. Not "Isn't she adorable?", just "How big was the rack?" You can tell something about people by the questions they ask. When Dave and I had a motorcycle accident after being married just 6 months I overheard his friend ask, "How's the bike?" I thought a more appropriate question might be "How's your wife?" I'm just saying. Anyway, we were in one living room with a big horn sheep (I think) and an antelope where the conversation went something like this:

It was 19 inches.

I couldn't believe it.

I measured it myself.

Is it in the book?

Oh, yeah. It's fifth in the state. Someteenth in the world.

They were talking about the antelope. I must admit I am ignorant of most things antelope related. I'm still trying to figure out if they are real or mythical. (The whole jackalope thing has me confused.) I wanted to know exactly what part of the antelope were they measuring. And exactly what book is 'the book' you would put something like this in. Maybe the missing book of the histories is in Wyoming. (I didn't need to know these things bad enough to ask them out loud.)

My plan is to keep my ears open and my mouth shut. I think my ignorance will be plenty evident.

I'm sure coyotes are real.

Play Fair

We had tea with the game warden. He monitors video game usage in Big Horn County for the state of Wyoming. His wife says he also is in charge of making sure words used in Scrabble are really words. I also played a new game called Bananagrams which is basically Scrabble (packed in a banana) without the board and the scoring numbers. It does still have 'Z's and 'Q's. Which you would have to mind if you were playing at the game warden's house.